


The road to myself

by Kurokaito



Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, Memory Loss, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-02-25 05:07:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 36,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21790528
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kurokaito/pseuds/Kurokaito
Summary: His name is the only thing you remember. Vague feelings of familiarity tickle yoru mind every day, but nothing you quite recognise. Your summon, a black cat, explains that you died and that the 'Master' had healed you. Finding the owner of the name appears to be a crucial piece in regaining your memories. And as luck would have it, he is quite famous.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 37





	1. Lost

“’Here lies (y/n) (y/sn)’ Tragic” you turned over to the cat at your side, “a bit over the top don’t you think?”. The black cat stared up with its usual bored expression. “You were gone for a year. They only found your arm. What did you expect?” he huffed, his tail tapping the ground. You rolled your eyes, not that the cat could see that. Both of your eyes were covered. When you woke up and wandered around, people had been staring oddly at your eyes. A blindfold attracted less attention. “It’s still a bit over the top. They didn’t find my body. Just my arm” you mused glancing back over the grave.  
A bouquet of forget-me-nots laid upon the headstone, still fresh. A smile crept on your rosy lips while your hand reached out and took the flowers. “It’s disrespectful to take from a grave” the cat stated. “It’s my grave, my flowers” you retorted and sniffed the flowers. “Let’s pay a visit to the Hokage, I hope he still remembers me though. I sure don’t” you murmured, putting the flowers back on the headstone and strolled out of the graveyard. As you passed a grave with fresh flowers, you gave a quick nod and a small smile. “Nice to see you again” you whispered.  
The cat looked at you, at the headstone and back. “Who lays there?” he questioned curiously. “Don’t know. I just know I know her” you said a bit hesitant. “Your memories are fogged up from the revival. Master told me you wouldn’t be able to remember anything. It’s a miracle you knew his name” the cat snorted. “And I’m glad he is a pretty wide known ninja” your hand reached up and clasped the headband bound to your upper arm. “And that I still had my headband. I wonder why I didn’t wear it over my eyes from the start though”. “Probably cause you didn’t give two shits about other’s opinions” the cat laughed. “I didn’t?” “Pretty much, you are just self-conscious now since you don’t know where to go or what to do. Even the word hokage is something you learned recently” the cat mocked.  
A growl left your lips and with a swift kick the cat flew a few meters into the air with a yelp. “Hey! I’m just stating the truth!” he snarled crawling back up. “That doesn’t mean you have to say it out loud” you growled passing the confused cat and ignoring the disapproving looks thrown your way. Beneath the blindfold your eyes closed and a tired sigh escaped your lips. With or without blindfold, attention seemed to be the only thing you achieved without a sweat. Looking over your shoulder you nodded to the black cat. He smirked and gave a nod back before disappearing in a puff of smoke.  
Kuro had helped you to get to the leaf village by tracking the scent of some leaf ninja in the perimeter. He deserved a break after a week full of traveling. 

With long, reluctant strides you went on the stairs. Darting out of the way as some people with documents and other stuff passed. They gave you a mere look over before continuing on their business. As a not particularly tall or muscled kunoichi you looked as intimidating as a puppy. Not that you couldn’t change their minds. It was just favourable to be underestimated.  
By listening to conversations and looking at the titles on the doors for a full hour in the hokage building you finally stumbled upon the word Office on a door. A small smile formed on your lips at the thought of seeing someone that could know you. This went together with a dreadful bubbling in your stomach, the fear of not being recognized.  
After three short knocks you pulled the blindfold off and opened your snow white eyes. An old, yet gentle voice called. “Come in”. Not giving yourself the chance to rethink your strategy, you entered the office with a small smile.  
The old man behind the oak desk looked up, a quartet of wrinkles deepening on each side of his eyes. His rhombus shaped hat with the sign for hogake on the front corner lowered over his eyes as he eyed you with suspicion. He seemed to think about his next move. The dreadful feeling began to rise up at the fact he didn’t smile. “How can I help you?”  
His voice cut through the air like a knife and had you blink in surprise. Sheepishly you rubbed the back of your head. “I’m sorry if I’m disturbing or something. I kind of lost my memories and I have a headband of the leaf village around my arm. I was wondering if you would know me” you said, embarrassed at the state you were in. This made you seem weak, having no memories could be used by the opponent as advantage. Right now though, you didn’t care. It had been 2 months since you woke up and you were done with not knowing anything.  
The eyes of the old man widened slightly, his hands folded over each other for his head to lean on. “Do you know your name?” he questioned. His eyes seemed unreadable to the normal person, however with your eyes you saw the test hidden in that question. “(y/n) (y/sn) I saw my grave not too long ago. My summon told me that they buried my arm” you said and lifted your right arm which seemed bleaker than the rest of your body. The sleeve which covered your right arm was ripped off on your left, rather, cut clean off.  
The hands of the old man began to shiver slightly as he stood from his chair and walked over to you. You took a step back, muscles tensing at his approach. He stopped just outside your personal space and looked straight into your eyes. His stern, wise gaze softened, “(y/n)… I have to ask of you to remove your glove” he whispered. Surprise flooded you together with hope, maybe it will give him a hint of who you were. You removed your only gloved hand, revealing the V shape on the back of your hand. The corner of it covered the knuckle of your middle finger.  
The tattoo had confused you ever since you saw it. Out of likes and dislikes you knew asymmetry wasn’t something you liked enough to put it into a tattoo. Also, a V? What does that even mean?  
The coal eyes of the Hokage watered. “A miracle has brought you back” he whispered and looked up at you, “welcome home (y/n)” he said with a fatherly smile.  
You blinked, twice, “Home?” he nodded and returned behind his desk. “(y/n) do you remember anything at all? Otherwise we need to catch you up on a lot” he said seriously but the smile still on his face. “All I know is my name and the name Hatake Kakashi. No clue who it is though” you sighed, shuffling on your feet. “I will call him. I am sure he is more than happy to see you”. Your head snapped up, “he’s here too? Also in leaf?” The hokage nodded. A smile formed on your lips and your heart skipped a beat. A huge weight fell of your shoulders. Who knew that visiting the hokage would lead to all kinds of leads from your past!  
The hokage motioned towards a chair in front of his desk, “take a seat. He is still busy with his students but I will get someone to fetch him” he smiled. You nodded and took a seat, your legs closed and your muscles still a bit stiff. Even thought the old man made you feel comfortable, your instincts didn’t allow you to relax. Your white eyes followed the movements of the old man as he wrote a document and called for someone. Your head snapped to the right before the shinobi even appeared and bowed to the hokage. “Bring this to Kakashi” he said with a gentle smile. “Yes, my lord” the Shinobi answered pledge fully and took the note. He spared you a curious glance and a shocked expression before disappearing in a puff of smoke. With question marks in your eyes you looked at the hokage. He chuckled, “he knew you, just not that well”. “What’s his name?” “Izumo Kamizuki”. You pondered over the name for a long time, hoping to spark something in your memory but nothing came to mind. With a defeated sigh you hung your head and crossed your arms. 

Your eyes already saw someone approaching even though they were still 5 blocks away. You focused your attention on that person. His chakra seemed so oddly familiar. It made you feel as if something grand was hidden behind a thick door in your mind, every time you try to open it you missed the keyhole.  
“You called?” a silver haired male appeared on the same spot Izumo had disappeared. A mask covered his lower face while his headband, with the leaf village symbol, covered his right eye. The hokage gave a smile and motioned to you, making your muscles tense up a tad more. His lazy looking eye moved over to you, only to widen in shock. His eye darted between the hokage and you three times before he coughed and focused on the hokage. “I didn’t know you had a guest, I could… wait outside” he said, oblivious to the reason he had been summoned. The hokage chuckled and shook his head. “No Kakashi, I summoned you exactly because of her” he said turning back to you, “(y/n) this is Hatake Kakashi. He will be taking care of you until your memories return” he looked over to Kakashi, “if you don’t mind that is”.  
“Not at all” he said, his voice sounded familiar and nervous. It made something inside of you lighten the weight in your stomach that had been bugging you since you entered the office. Standing up abruptly you held out a hand and a smile, “I-I’ll be in your care”. A curse left under your breath. Why did you even need to stutter? Your eyes glanced up, seeing his still shocked expression had you calming a bit. At least you weren’t the only one feeling all over the place. “Do you mind staying at his house (y/n)?” The old man’s voice interrupted your train of thought and made you realize you still held his hand. Pulling it back quickly you turned to the hokage and smiled, “no problem”. The hokage nodded and turned towards Kakashi, “then you both are dismissed” he smiled. Kakashi nodded and turned heel to stroll out of the door. You were about to follow but stopped and looked back at the old man. “Sorry, but I didn’t catch your name” you said uncomfortable, better late than never though. “Hiruzen Sarutobi” he smiled. “Nice to meet ya… again” you grinned before turning tail and running after Kakashi who had already gained a head start.  
“Soooo… do you know me?” you questioned curiously as you walked next to the masked man on the street. He glanced down on you, his hands in his pockets as he took long strides towards his house. “Do you know me?” he questioned back, his eyes revealing nothing but lazy curiosity. “No. I did know your name though. That was the only thing I knew when I woke up. Next to my own name that is” you said thoughtfully tapping your chin. “Now, I asked first” you said glancing up at him. He turned the road in front of him and nodded. A smile crept on your lips, “what kind of relation did we have? I mean, you must be special if I only know your name” you wondered. “We were close” was all he said.  
“How close?” you turned fully to him while walking backwards with ease. Your eyes enabling you to see in a 5 km radius.  
Kakashi turned his lazy eye to your curious expression, but just skipped the question and kept on walking. After walking for five minutes in silence you returned to his side. “Boyfriend and girlfriend?” you mused. The silver haired male coughed, surprise clear on his face as he turned to you. If the mask wasn’t there you probably could see a slight change in colour, probably. “What makes you think that?” he coughed, regaining his cool bored statue. You rolled your eyes and prodded his side. “Cause you don’t answer, if we were friends it wouldn’t be awkward to say so”.  
“Sorry to disappoint you, but we weren’t” he sighed. You arched a brow, wondering if that sigh was from disappointment or tiredness of your antics.  
Probably both. 

“Here we are” he announced standing before a small house a bit further from the rest of the houses. You hummed stepping into the yard. “It looks nice…. Where did I live?” “In town. You had a small apartment”. “This looks better” you nodded to yourself. Kakashi, slightly uncomfortable with that sentence, moved in front of you and opened the door with the key.  
You walked into the dull hall and put off your shoes. There was a small dresser at the side of the coatrack. Further there were 2 doors and stairs leading up. “Left is the kitchen, right is the living room” Kakashi explained as he put off his shoes. Your head whipped around, making Kakashi frown in question. “Can I explore?” you asked with sparkling puppy eyes. After a second of considering if saying no was even an option he gave a curt nod.  
With a happy laugh you dashed through the hall and slipped around the corner. The kitchen was small, a high bar like structure separating the cooking utilities from the table with 4 chairs around it. The walls were a creamy white while the tiles were marble. Dashing into the living room you smiled at the sight of the fireplace. It was small, but it was something. A two seat couch stood in front of the fireplace and a grey carpet covered the wooden floor between the couch and the fireplace. A long cabinet stood against the wall behind the couch, some pictures were on them. Your eyes scanned over the pictures, from Kakashi’s younger days you saw one picture of his team and his sensei. They all seemed strangely familiar, especially the girl. Then further down was a picture that took your attention immediately. Your hands shivered slightly as you took the frame up for closer inspection. “That dress looked beautiful on you”. His low voice snapped you from the picture, and stared straight into his coal eye. “It seems so…” you placed the picture of you in a slim black dress and Kakashi in a suit down. “Would you like some tea?” he questioned with a gentlemanly smile forming under his mask. A broad smile appeared as you nodded, “I haven’t had anything decent in weeks!” you exclaimed and followed after him into the kitchen. “Is that so?” Kakashi mused. “Yeah, it took me three months to actually realize what my headband meant and find the leaf village” you sighed defeated, “had to live in the wild since I have no money on me”. “You always were a resourceful kunoichi” Kakashi chuckled and turned to you, his back to the kettle on the fire. “For example?” you hummed, leaning against the bar like structure.  
“When your rations were gone, you found some weird looking plant and ate it. It ended well 9 out of ten times” he grinned. “And the other one?” “You were hurtling up all your rations” he chuckled.  
Kakashi turned around as the kettle whistled and with fluent movements he poured the tea in a traditional metal kettle. He put the tea leaves inside and turned back to you. His eyes looking you up and down, staring. “What?” you crossed your arms, looking straight back. “Nothing” he shrugged and turned back to the tea and poured it into two cups.  
A frown creased your eyebrows. You came from the dead and he was supposedly really close before you died. He could at least give a hug, or something.  
As Kakashi poured you walked soundless over to him. Your hands placed on each side of his body, against the kitchen table. For a small second you could feel his muscles tense. “The tea is done” he said, confusing your assertiveness with impatience for the tea.  
“Did you miss me?”  
He paused. You slowly leaned back, giving him space to turn around, which he didn’t.  
Just as you thought he wouldn’t answer, he spoke.  
“Yes”.  
Your head snapped up and looked at his broad shoulders. A wave of relieve washed over you as you stepped back and leaned against the wall. “I’m glad… somehow. I feel bad I made you feel that way though” you murmured staring at your feet. A gasp left your lips as an elbow was slammed against the wall next to your head. You glanced from the arm slowly up to meet his abyss like eye. His other hand was placed on the other side of your head, leaving no room of escape as his shadow loomed over you.  
“Kakashi?” you questioned hesitantly. “(y/n). I thought you died. I thought you left my life even before we had a shot at anything together” he whispered in a croaky voice. You tried swallowing a lump that was forming in your throat but it had no effect. “I’m sorry” you whispered wholeheartedly. His eye softened as he leaned closer to you. If it was any other this would be a seriously uncomfortable situation. However, with Kakashi it seemed alright. As Kakashi drew closer his eye seemed to suck you in. A never ending abyss that held the comfort of knowing you were alive and well in his arms. “Uh.. the tea is getting cold?” you said flustered.  
Kakashi’s head hung as he let out a sigh. He pushed himself reluctantly from the wall and went over to the cups of tea, handing you one. You smiled and took it before trotting off to the living room. The two seat was velvet and soft, as if you would sit down on a sheep. Kakashi took a seat next to you and glanced over while you sipped the tea.  
Your eyes sparkled as they darted to the silver haired male. “This is Sencha right! You remember! I love this” you chimed and took another small sip. Kakashi chuckled and looked down at his tea. “Curious you remember” he mused. You paused mid sip and stared at him. “You are right…” a smile crept on your lips, “meeting you is already jugging my memories” you chimed. He gave a low chuckle, a sound that made something inside of you stir in delight. 

“How did your tea disappear?” you eyed the empty cup and the masked man with suspicion. “I drunk it” said man responded dryly. “How?” your eyes narrowed in suspicion. “Just- What are you doing?” his voice slightly changed as you prodded the mask where his mouth should be. “It isn’t even wet” you concluded confused. “I don’t drink through my mask, if you thought that” he mused putting the empty cup down. You took the last sip and put the cup down as well.  
Your narrowed eyes stared at the male in suspicion. It was slightly frustrating that you hadn’t seen his face yet. He arched a brow, “something wrong?” “Has anyone ever seen your face?”  
A devious grin appeared on the wrinkles of the mask. “You actually have”. You blinked in surprise but resumed the glare, “now I want to see it even more” you murmured. He chuckled, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “Do you now?”  
Your eyes darted from his mask to his eyes and scowled, “you aren’t going to pull it down, are you?” he gave a close eyed smile as a response. “Fine” you huffed, the scowl making place for a mischievous grin. Before Kakashi could respond to the change in expression you jumped on top of him, his arms pinned in mere seconds, thanks to the element of surprise you could pull the mask down. A second mask stared back at you.  
You scowled and tried to pry the second one off, but the element of surprise had worn off and with a swift movement Kakashi switched positions, having you now pinned to the couch with a scowl on your face. There was a satisfied smirk apparent under his mask, his eyes shining with amusement and something that you couldn’t quite place.  
“You have gotten rusty, if that’s the best what you can do” he mused. You paused and glared up at him. “Yeah? Well fuck you and your one year of not being frozen in time” you snapped and struggled more. His hands tightened around your wrists, gaining a small groan while you glared up at him. He was closer than you had initially thought. His face hovered over yours mere centimetres away.  
“You were frozen in time?” his deep voice echoed through your ears. Casting your eyes to the side you nodded, “it took a year in this time for the master to heal my broken body”. “Master?” he asked dubiously. “Master of my summons” you whispered, feeling really self-conscious of his body topping yours. His legs pinned both of yours, his lower body leaning on your waist, one hand still firmly holding both of your wrists, his other hand resting next to your head.  
“Sure you want to see underneath my mask, (y/n)?” how your name rolled of his tongue felt so natural, so soothing. Your eyes focused on the black cloth while you gave an affirmative nod. He chuckled, the action causing vibrations run through his body. You eyes widened as his supporting hand was lifted and tugged his mask down, teasingly slow.  
He was gorgeous. Handsome didn’t even come to describe it. His lips formed into a taunting smirk before your chin was slightly lifted.  
You didn’t struggle, even though your mind already figured out what would happen. Something about this felt so natural, familiar, so good.  
His lips brushed against yours. It felt slightly rougher than your own. You leaned forward, struggling to get your arms free. He chuckled and his lips took a hold of your upper lip and lightly pulled. Your eyes closed in enjoyment as light sparks filled every fibre in your body. His lips moved from your upper lip to the corner of your mouth, placing soft kisses, to the bottom lip where he lightly pulled. Your lips parted and attempted to do the same to his upper lip. A small smile formed at your actions and he leaned in deeper, his torso resting upon yours. His hand tangling into your hair.  
He tugged at your hair, your head tilting back with a gasp. His lips took a hold of your bottom lip once again but this time his teeth nibbled on the soft skin. You squirmed in his hold, wanting to wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer. He hummed and kissed you deeper, teasingly licking the skin he had just bitten. You groaned, wanting more. Your body heating up with the lust forming in the core of your body.  
“Let go” you breathed. Kakashi blinked surprised, but not wanting to upset you he actually let go of your hands and attempted to sit up. He was stopped however as your arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him into a deep intoxicating kiss. His widened eyes soon closed in enjoyment while his hands roamed over the back of your tilted head.  
Your hand grasped his silver hair while the other hand held onto the fabric of his shirt. The kiss tasted sweet with a hint of bitterness from the tea earlier. His movements were smooth but rough. Both of you competing for dominance, which was won by Kakashi. One hand slid down the crook of your neck, making you shiver in delight. His eyes opened as he pulled back, a whine of disagreement leaving your lips. He chuckled, a rumbling and breathy sound. A pout formed on your lips as your legs tangled with his.  
“No memories but still want to continue?” he questioned lightly, but from his eyes you could tell how deep those words went, how much they meant. “With you” you breathed and pulled yourself to his ear, “it feels right”. A content smirk appeared on your lips as a shudder went down his spine. “You s-” “Sush Kakabaka, just do” you smirked placing a finger on his lips, silencing him. His eyes widened slightly at the mention of his old nickname. You chuckled as he pushed you down into the couch again and began kiss down your sensitive neck. Those giggles soon turned into moans as his gentle kissing turned into biting, sucking, leaving a chain of marks.  
His hands travelled under your shirt, his lukewarm hands creating goose bumps to run along your skin. Your eyes fluttered open, gazing at his silver hair, his fair skin and the little mole below the right corner of his mouth. You bit your lip as you pried his bodywarmer open and shoved it off him. Next your hands went under his shirt and tugged at it. The silver haired male chuckled and sat up on your waist. His hands placed at the hem off his shirt while his eyes were focused on you.  
A purr of delight left your lips when his hands pulled his shirt up, revealing perfectly toned abs. His pulled of shirt revealed a smug grin as he leaned down and continued kissing your collarbone. You groaned in frustration while your hands roamed over his muscled back. His hands rested on the brim of your shirt while he looked up at you, longing visible in his eye while he silently asked for permission.  
You growled in frustration and put your hands on his, pulling your shirt off with some minor struggle, leaving you in a black bra. He stared at it, adoring the little frills, not minding the battered up shape it was.  
You coughed, gaining his attention once more. You rolled your eyes at is inaction, which seemed to amuse him. Tilting yourself up a bit, straining your abdominal muscles you reached back and fumbled with the clip to undo the bra. Kakashi chuckled at the difficulty you had with undoing the cursed thing. He leaned over, his masculine scent environing you, and his smooth hands undid your bra. You blinked in surprise before glaring at him. “How can you do that?” you questioned suspiciously. He blinked and chuckled at your reaction, “I am a shinobi. Undoing boundaries is a must” he mused leaning closer. “Hn, smooth save” you murmured and pushed his head towards you into another deep kiss. His callused hands caressed up your sides and began massaging your boobs. A breathless gasp left your lips at his roughness. Your hands trailed down his sides to the rim of his pants and teasingly nudged the skin just beneath the rim. Kakashi groaned in frustration, your leg going up and rubbing against his hard clothed package.  
His lips trailed down, over the marks he had previously made, his hands sliding down your sides to your hips. Your eyes followed him in anticipation. His hands fumbling with the button for a mere second, before pulling your pants down, leaving you in just your underwear. The silver haired man had pulled your legs up while he sat in front of you. One hand caressing over your inner thigh, while he bit in the other thigh, his eyes focused on your flustered figure.  
“Your headband” you whispered and reached over, “can you remove it?” you questioned, wondering why you would even ask it since he hadn’t had much problems with his mask. A grin appeared on those devilish lips while he kissed your thigh. “Do you want me to remove it?” he mused huskily. A shade of red adorned your cheeks while you gave a definite nod. He gave a helpless smile while his hands left your legs. Dropping them gently to his sides. He reached up and undid the knot, your eyes focused on him in anticipation of what would hide underneath.  
Your eyes widened slightly as a scar ran vertically through his eyelid. “Sharingan” you whispered, a word feeling so familiar, yet unknown. Kakashi nodded with a smile, leaning over and placing a gentle kiss on your forehead. “Seems you remember little by little” he mused looking at you. A goofy grin appeared even though your eyes were still lusty, “cause of you”. He smiled and kissed your lips once again his hands on your hips, lifting them slightly.  
Your pout interrupted the kiss, making Kakashi arch a brow in question. “Pants” you demanded. He chuckled, “of course, my lady” he purred while he undid his pants and threw it to the side. Continuing kissing.  
Your hands resumed their exploration over his back, down to his sides, until they reached his V-line. He shivered slightly at the light caress so close to a place so sensitive. A devious smirk appeared on your lips as in one quick movement your hand was inside his underwear and holding onto his shaft while your thumb circled his tip. He groaned at the sudden touch and glared with a playful glint at you. You smiled innocently while your hand slowly rubbed him up and down. A breathy chuckle left his lips as he moved from your lips down to your neck, as he bit down, making your groan, his hands went down into your underwear and caressed teasingly light.  
You bit your lip, glancing down on his flushed smirking face. The silver haired man was kissing down your collarbone and made kiss marks on your breasts. His hand increased its pressure making you gasp as he rubbed over your good spot. Biting your lip in defiance, you began rubbing him faster, a second hand joining in his pants, fondling his junk. He growled, his face revealing his pleasure, but also the frustration of the fact that you were so good.  
A gasp left your lips as a finger was thrusted inside your wet entrance. Biting your lip you glanced down on his focused lustful gaze. The sight turning your insides into jelly. Moans left your lips as his finger prodded around while he bit and sucked on the sensitive soft parts of your body. Your hands slowing down as the pleasure takes away your concentration.  
Kakashi smirked in satisfaction as he thrusted a second finger inside. You moaned softly and leaned over to him, your hands pulled out of his pants while your eyes are hazy from the heat. Your arms wrapped around him, pulling him into a deep hot kiss. He gladly obliged with your need but didn’t seized preparing your entrance.  
Your mind as hazy as it was, did not notice how the third finger was thrusted inside and had you panting in his strong arms. The moment your mind cleared enough to see what was going on, Kakashi was positioned between your legs. They rested on his shoulders while he leaned over slightly, the muscles on his back partly visible, strained to keep in in that position. He looked at you with those same desire filled eyes, yet once again he silently asked for permission. While panting your rolled your eyes. “K-Kakashi, come on” you groaned, “don’t st-” you gasped as he thrusted his full length slowly inside. Taking deep breaths you looked up at him, his eyes sympathetic while his body was straining to hold himself back. “Are you okay?” he panted. Your hands reached up and held onto his muscled back. “Yeah” you exhaled, “slow”. He nodded and slowly began to move out and thrusted back in.  
With every thrust the strain on your entrance seemed to lessen, until it completely welcomed his cock. He groaned with pleasure as you tightened on him. Your breaths ragged, turning into moans as his slow pace turned to into a rough speed.  
The room was filled with sounds of moans and collision of skin. A particular loud moan from both parties had the room turning silent. The male slowly pulled himself out and pulled you on top of him. Searching with his hand around under the couch he pulled a fluffy blanket out and covered your naked body with it. With a gentle kiss on your forehead he sighed content. You glanced up at him with a shy smile before snuggling into his firm, yet soft chest. “I love you (y/n)” he whispered softly. You glanced up at him and gave him a sweet smile. “I love you too Kakabaka”. He rolled his eyes at your chuckle. Reaching his hands up and ruffling up you already messed up hair. You groaned and slapped his chest in defiance, “Meany” you pouted. “Shush (y/n)” he mused and pulled and arm over your back and a hand on your head. “Still my Meany” you whispered content. He chuckled and cared your head until you fell into a deep slumber.


	2. Fixed

The Jonin blinked sheepishly and frowned upon the missing weight on his chest. A taught of yesterday being just a dream had him jump up and ran frantically to the first thing the girl would approach. “Morning” you munched on a piece of bacon with delight. Upon seeing you the silver haired male sighed with relieve and returned to his usual cool posture while taking a seat in front of you. “Slept well?” he questioned reaching towards your plate. A scowl appeared as you stared at his approaching hand. “Yeah…” you answered absentmindedly. You didn’t want him stealing your food, it was against your nature to share food. On the other side, the food you used to cook was originally his.

Kakashi, seeing you internal struggle, chuckled and went for a piece of toast and when you looked up it had already disappeared under his mask. You smirked at the odd, but sexy sight of him in just mask and pants. “Surprisingly no headband?” you mused. He blinked in surprise and scurried off to the Livingroom. Only to come back fully dressed. You rolled your eyes, “wasn’t minding it though”. “Of course” he grinned. “Oh sush you” you grunted finishing your plate of roasted bacon and toast. Kakashi went over to the coffee machine and made himself a strong black cup. “Any dreams?” he questioned without looking at you. “No, why?” you sipped the tea you had prepared earlier. “You used to have nightmares a lot” he said, pouring himself a cup of coffee. “Did I? Did it tell you what they were about?” your interest was piqued. He shook his head and returned to his seat. “ You always said you couldn’t explain it since it isn’t of this world” he stated calmly.

You hummed in response, pondering over the answer with a sleep drunken mind. Deciding it was too early you concentrated on the light bitter taste of the tea warming your hands.

“What will you be doing today?” “Besides babysitting you?” he mused. “Besides looking after my memory-blanc self” you mocked. “I will be supervising the training of my students. One in particular could jog your memory” he said thoughtfully. “It’s the son of the fourth Hokage, the one you considered as a brother” he said staring into the black abyss of his coffee. “The son of.. isn’t it easier to see the fourth hokage if I know him?”

“He died a long time ago. Protecting the village and ending the war” Kakashi deadpanned. Your eyes widened slightly, something cracking in your mind as if the wheels of memory were jogged.

_“Why can’t I go as well!” “Direct orders from lord fourth. No one is to leave the barrier besides his chosen ones”. “That is not fair! I want to protect the village! I want to protect Mi-chan as well!” “Look, I still don’t like the way how you call the fourth hokage without any ounce of respe-” “Shut up! I respect him more than any other being!” you snapped angrily at the man for two reasons. One, to deny your respect for the fourth and also the only one who acted like family towards you. Second, avoiding the discussion of letting you out of the barrier._

_Smart guy._

“Are you alright?”

The blurry spots slowly became outlined and turned into the kitchen with Kakashi still in front of you. you closed your eyes and shook your head, shaking off the hazy feeling. “I just remembered something” you muttered looking down at the empty plate. “Something?” Kakashi questioned when you didn’t continue to elaborate. A grudging smile appeared on your lips. “I couldn’t save anyone. That’s what I thought after remembering the discussion at the time in the barrier” you looked up to meet a sympathetic gaze. “What has happened, happened. Don’t ponder on the past or it will ruin your mind for the future” Kakashi said. The feeling of familiarity at those words made your skin crawl. “Have you said that to me before?” He shook his head, “you told me”.

You gave a solemn nod and tried to jog your memory with those words, to jog it with repeating the discussion over and over again, but it was like something pushed the off button of your memories.

“Want another helping?” Kakashi arched a brow at your empty plate. A grin spread on your face, “thanks”. He nodded and went off to fry some bacon and toast bread. Your eyes followed his figure move in the kitchen. His back looked so familiar, like every bloody thing. It’s becoming more and more frustrating to not remember anything.

‘At least I remember last night’.

“That smile is a bit creepy” Kakashi mused putting down a full plate. Your eyes sparkled at the sight of food and it didn’t take long to dig in, ignoring his rude comment. “Will you come along to the training?” you looked up with a stuffed mouth. Swallowing it away you nodded. “What time?” “An hour ago”. “You are a bad sensei”. “Oh kinky”.

You blinked before grinning at his bored look. “Better not go too _Hard_ on them” you purred. Even though his face remained blanc, you swore you could hear his heart skip a beat. “Just stern enough” he retorted coolly. With a victorious grin you stood up. “Mind if I look through your closet? This-” you motioned to your ragged clothes, “isn’t really a sight”. “Help yourself, just act like you are home” he mused finishing his coffee. His expression contorted into one of disgust as it had turned lukewarm. You chuckled and left the kitchen. In his room you rummaged through his clothes, deciding on a black turtleneck and a pair of green pants. The rope around the waist had to be altered to avoid any pants drop and the trouser legs needed to be folded, but other than that it was fine. After a quick shower you returned fully dressed in his clothes.

“Do you think that I need to cover my eyes?” you asked, thinking back on the reactions you had been receiving the past days. Kakashi pushed himself of the wall he was leaning against and brushed a few strands of hair out of your face. “It would be a shame to do so” he hummed. The light touch of his fingers left little sparks in its wake. A shy smile appeared as you glanced up at the tall male. “Your zipper is open”.

He blinked in surprise and looked down only to find a finger poking his nose. “Gotcha” you grinned mischievously before dashing through the door and waving over at him. “Where do we need to go?” you asked. Kakashi chuckled at your eagerness to go, “Follow me” he stated and leaped off the ground with you right behind.

“Kakashi sensei! You are late!” a pink haired girl exclaimed. “Sorry Sakura, I got lost on the path of life” Kakashi said sheepishly, landing in front of three teens. “That’s a lie Dattebayo!” a blonde accused pointing his finger at the silver haired Jonin. Behind the two energetic teens there was a raven haired one that looked at the situation as if he was just someone from the audience.

“Kakashi? Who is that?” the pink asked as she looked past the silver haired male. It seems he was late a lot, considering their easy forgiving attitude. “Ah” Kakashi stepped aside, looking as if he just remembered you still followed him, “this is (y/n) (y/sn). She is under my care for a while” he stated. All three students look up at you with curiosity. “What’s with your eyes?” The blonde received a painfully powerful punch to the top of his head. “Don’t be rude Naruto!”

_“His name will be Naruto”. You looked confused, “fish cake? Why fish cake?” your face contorted into a grimace. The tall blonde haired male laughed and waved your negativity off. “I like it” he stated. “His sensei used the same name in his book” the red haired female said while rubbing her slightly bulging belly. “Sensei? Erofrog? Doesn’t he write erotic novels?” your scowl deepened. “This one isn’t. It isn’t a best seller like his erotic novels, but it’s still one of his best works” the blonde laughed. You looked up, seeing his cerulean eyes beaming with joy. His spikey hair bouncing as his head moved to face the love of his life. “isn’t it?” he asked, meeting her Aegean coloured eyes. “It is. NOW GET YOUR ASS OUTSIDE BEFORE I WHACK YOU” the red hair seethed at the stalling blonde. A nervous drop of sweat ran down his face, “I’ll see you tonight” he laughed nervously before dashing through the door._

_The red hair sighed and looked at his back with adoration and love._

“I am so sorry, he’s an idiot and forgot to take his pills” The pink haired girl excused. “Hey! I’m not an idiot!” Naruto shouted indignantly. You blinked, the memory spreading a warm feeling in your body. “It’s fine” you chuckled amused by their antics, “Nice to meet you all”. A smile appeared on both the pink haired girl and the blonde guy. Before she could even utter a word Naruto interrupted, his hands in his sides while his chest puffed and his chin held high. “I’m Uzumaki Naruto and I will become the Hokage, Dattebayo!” he exclaimed proudly. You chuckled, the resemblance between him and Mi-chan were uncanny. The shape of his head came from Kushina’s side, while his hair colour and his build resembled Minato. His eyes was unlike either of them, they were a beautiful sky blue, holding as much fire as Mi-chan had, maybe even more.

“I’m Haruno Sakura” the pink haired girl smiled shyly looking up at you. You gave a polite smile. How her attitude did a 180 degree turn was a bit disturbing. Maybe she’s on her period. Your eyes travelled over to the raven haired male. ‘He resembles Itachi….’. “What’s your name?”

“Uchiha Sasuke” he stated glaring. Okay, this kid really had a stick up his ass. Must be an Uchiha thing. Maybe.

Kakashi clapped his hands together, your head snapping up at him in reaction. “Okay, now introductions are finished, let’s get started” he stated and shooed his students towards the training grounds. He threw you a questioning look, probably having noticed your momentarily black out. “A memory” you smiled fondly of it, “Mi-chan was a good man”.

“Would you like to join training or go on your own?” “I’d like… I want to walk around. Maybe something along the way will jog up my memory” you smiled. He nodded, “I’ll be back around diner” he stated before going off after his students. So you stood alone on the bridge, its old wooden beams supporting it still, the edges freshly painted in red. Underneath ran a small creek, which a ninja would have no trouble crossing by merely jumping. 

After a while of staring into the clear water you went off through the woods and into the town. As soon as you left the woods there was already something catching your attention. Kakashi was stalking after you. A frown appeared at the thought of him leaving the students. Broadening your sense to the training ground you immediately understood. He had left his shadow clone to watch over his students.

Just ignoring him right now would be the best. Confronting him means you saw him, and that means that he will be more careful next time.

As you walked through the busy market street your nose was violated by all kinds of scents. Your eyes feasted upon the brightly coloured stands and shops, the sellers yelling about their sales and the diversity in people walking the streets. From housemothers, to housefathers, children and shinobi all gathered on the street. In this mass the people didn’t even take notice of your odd eyes.

With a broad smile you marched through the crowd, skilfully dodging hurrying people and reckless children. Until a guy called out.

At first you ignored it, figuring it was for someone else, but then he said: “Hey! Girl with the turtleneck!” a cheery smile on his face, which didn’t quite reach his eyes. Deciding to humor the man you stepped up at him. He was a head taller, his brown hair in a croppy haircut. His eyes a hazel brown which could make some girls swoon. Some, not you. “Yes?” you questioned as he grinned at your attention. “I was wondering if a beautiful girl like you would like to get a cup of tea with me” he asked, holding out his hand, “the name is Jet, Ushina Jet”. Your eyes lit up at the mention of your favourite drink, your hand taking his into a firm shake. “(y/n)” you stated, not bothering with your surname. This seemed to please enough as he hooked your arm and lead you into a small cozy looking café. Once at the table he grabbed the attention of the waiter. “We would li-” “I would like a cup of Bancha tea and some dango” you interrupted. He paused, giving a sheepish smile, “same for me” he said. The waiter nodded and left the table.

There was something uneasy in the man’s eyes. The way his heart sped up and his chakraflow changed betrayed the fact that something wasn’t going the way he wanted it to. “So Jet, what do you do?” you interrupted his chain of thoughts apparently as he took a second longer than he should on answering.

The man went on how he had a business that was flourishing, being pretty vague about the contents of that business. You didn’t mind his talking, tuning it out wasn’t that difficult. You could sense Kakashi just across the street hidden within the shadows. He seemed restless, or angry, hard to tell from where you sat.

Jet ceased his talking when the tea arrived. Taking the tea to your mouth you pretended to take a sip, but instead sniffed it. The tea was okay. It was hard to make an odourless poison or drug. Then your eyes travelled to the dango. Its sweet glory already tempting you to eat it. Holding yourself strong you repeated the process with the sweet treat. Deeming no drugs or poison inside you made quick work of the sweet treat and afterwards sipped casually on the tea. The hot beverage never leaving your hands.

Your eyes caught the movement of the man under the table. He had a small pipette with a clear liquid inside. “- and there is where you can buy great mochi” he said whilst pointing to a shop across the street. You gave a small smile and rolled your eyes to the side to look, your cup of tea at your mouth. “Sounds like a good place to visit” you mused. The man clicked his tongue in frustration.

Putting the empty cup on the table you gave a polite smile, “thank you for the nice cup of tea. Maybe I’ll see you around again” you said sweetly. The man stood up abruptly as you took your time. His gaze fixed irritated on you. Before he could even utter a word you disappeared on a puff of smoke. Making quick way to the roof of the building you watched amused as the man angrily tramped outside. The feeling even more fuelled as Kakashi appeared from the shadows for a mere second to drag the man out of sigh.

“Such a worrywart” you laughed before leaping off the roof and traveling a great distance across town. Hiding out in an alleyway you watched Kakashi’s movements with a grin. He had lost you. Serves him right for following you ‘secretly’. Humming content you walked down the streets, enjoying the chattering people and the architecture.

After an hour you noticed that Kakashi’s clone had disappeared and his students were on the move. An idea crossed your mind. ‘If Kakashi isn’t teaching, I could teach them a thing or two. Maybe. At least I can figure out what I can do’. With that in mind you leaped on the roof and swiftly arrived at the forest where team 7 was walking.

“I can’t believe he had a clone watching over our important training!” Naruto exclaimed pumping his fist angrily in the air. Sasuke scoffed in agreement while Sakura seethed with clenched fists. “I bet he’s after that girl” she growled.

“You mean me? Yes he was after me but I gave him the slip” you mused appearing behind the three teens in a puff of smoke. They all snapped around, Naruto and Sakura taking a step back in surprise while Sasuke refrained from doing so, his expression said he was just as surprised though. Their sensing could use some extra training, but for brats, not bad.

“You gave him the slip? You gave a Jonin the slip?” Sakura asked in disbelief. “I may not look it, but I am around the same age as him” you mused, placing your hands on your hips. “Yeah right, even if that was true, age doesn’t mean you are a Jonin!” Naruto exclaimed pointing at you. “Who says I wasn’t a Jonin?” you grinned, the blonde taking another step back.

“Since Kakashi likes to abandon his duties as teacher I will help you guys train today” you stated. Naruto’s eyes widened before he cheered. Sasuke seemed to doubt your skills while Sakura smiled hopefully. “And how will you train us?” Sasuke asked gruffly. A smirk appeared on your face while you opened your arms. “Attack me. Come at me with the intent to kill” your eyes narrowed, a fierce glint appearing. Naruto swallowed looking uncertain at his teammates. Sasuke looked pleased, unlike his teammates and immediately dashed for you, throwing shuriken as a diversion of his main attack of taijutsu.

Your body reacted before your mind could even comprehend what was happening. Dodging to the opposite side you expected Sasuke to attack. You caught his foot and then his hand, as he kicked and punched, and threw him with his momentum against a tree. This didn’t stop him as he barely managed to bounce back on it with his feet and came onto you while making hand signs. “Fire style: Great fireball release!” he exclaimed taking a deep breath, his hand placed at his mouth. With his exhale a large ball of fire shot towards you.

Quick hand signs had you disappear into the ground, the fire falling into the mud. Sasuke looked around with his sharingan, trying to find you. Before he had the chance to do so you shot up behind him and with a swift movement had a kunai at his throat. His own kunai. He clicked his tongue in frustration.

You smiled and let him go, stretching your hand in front of your eyes a grin appeared. “Water, earth and lighting” you whispered to yourself, feeling the element’s affinity within your core. Sasuke eyed your strange behaviour as if you had gone mad.

“That was so cool!” Naruto cheered running up to you. “Hey, hey, hey! Can you teach me how you appeared behind Sasuke like that?” he asked enthusiastic. You chuckled and ruffled his hair, “I will when you learn your chakra nature”. “Chakra nature?” he questioned confused. “Like Sasuke uses the element fire. Shinobi have a certain affinity with elements, I for example have water, lightning and earth” you explained. Naruto nodded as if he understood it, while his eyes were saying something else.

“How do you know what affinity you have?” Sakura asked curiously. “There….” You paused thinking how you knew, “there is a paper that upon receiving chakra will reveal the nature of that chakra” you explained more to yourself than to them. A smile spreading on your lips.

“Do you have that paper with ya?” Naruto asked, his eyes shining with determination. You shook your head with a chuckle, “no. You should ask Kakashi for that. For now..” you eyes the three teens, “let’s work on dodging my attacks”. They all break out in nervous sweat at your sweet smile.

“…. What happened here?”

“Oh there you are” you smiled innocently while putting a Kunai between your boobs. “I wondered where you were”. Kakashi looked over the sight of the training grounds. His three students laid panting on the ground, Sasuke and Naruto still trying to get up in their battered state. “Did you actually go full out on them?” Kakashi questioned accusingly. “Not by a long shot” you shrugged, putting your hands behind your head. “I just taught them how to dodge” you smirked. Kakashi looked unnerved at that statement. Sakura slowly sat up and pointed at their Sensei. “Kakashi sensei! You left a clone with us while you promised supervising us!” she exclaimed.

“Yeah I-” he rubbed the back of his head, “I left myself to supervise you. You all did a good job on making the clone disappear” he improvised. You rolled your eyes and strolled over to him, poking his nose. “Next time you can just ask to stalk me” you whispered before trotting off towards his house.

The silver haired Jonin trained for another three hours with the exhausted teens before returning home. There he found you, as he expected, in the kitchen. What he hadn’t expected was the blue apron tied to your front and your hair bound in a pony tail. All this to avoid getting dirty from the spluttering oil you used to make stir-fried rice with grilled vegetables.

“Welcome back” you hummed, not bothering turning around to see who had entered the room. “I’m home” his voice was slightly hesitant, a feeling of melancholy tugging at the man’s mind. “Your students show a lot of promise. They didn’t do half bad”. “They were beat up”. “They didn’t die” you retorted looking over your shoulder to an amused Kakashi.

“What do you think of them, individually?” he questioned curiously as he stood next to you. Your eyes focused back on the frying pan.

“Naruto seems to take a lot after his father, if my memory serves me right. Sasuke is arrogant and stubborn but shows a lot of potential. The pink haired girl is someone that troubles me, though” you thought out loud.

You felt a gentle hand placed in-between your shoulder blades as Kakashi peered over your shoulder at the food. “How so?” 

“Between two of the probably most potential holding teens, it is quite the peer pressure” you sighed and glanced over at him. “Compared to them she doesn’t shine”.

“You might be right… but she has potential” he stated leaning back from the heat of the food.

“That I didn’t deny, her control of her chakra is great. I would like to train with her sometime. To give her a bit of a head start on those future power houses” you mused.

“Power houses?” Kakashi arched a brow.

“The last of the Uchiha right? And the Jinchuriki. I’m willing to bet my life that they will become great shinobi” you stated.

“How do you… When did you remember?” he asked. You shut the fire off and put the food on two plates before turning to him with a smile.

“I didn’t. Not really. Something made me remember the fact that the Uchiha clan was massacred by the brother of Sasuke and the knowledge of Naruto being a Jinchuriki lies within my eyes” you wriggled your eyebrows playfully and put the food down. Kakashi slowly took a seat and arched a brow.

“The only thing I knew about your eyes was that they could see further than the byakugan but not as detailed” he said taking up a spoon. You mirrored his actions and hummed,

“don’t know much more yet. I could see a second chakra in Naruto and did the math… Shall we eat now?” you asked, eagerly awaiting the tasty treat of a freshly cooked diner.

The silver haired male chuckled and gave a nod. You took that as an okay and began digging in, the food disappearing within minutes.

“Your appetite never ceases to amaze me” he mused as you took a second helping.

“Maybe cause I need to eat a year worth extra” you shrugged. “That’s rich, since you didn’t eat less before you… died” he was hesitant about your death. It was understandable, even though you didn’t exactly remember him. The thought of Losing Kakashi made something crack inside. Something precious.

“I did not die though” you spoke sitting down with a full plate. He looked up at that remark. “You people just assumed I did, but you only found my arm. Which I have regenerated with the guidance of Master”.

“Could you tell me exactly what happened?” he asked, putting his spoon down and giving you full attention. “I can’t. I could tell you with the three months after I came back to this dimension. But it isn’t all that interesting” you shrugged.

“This dimension?” his voice uttering disbelieve.

“Yes, for the year I was gone here, I in another dimension. The homeland of my summon animal”.

“That’s impossible. Dimensional jutsu is not only forbidden but also extremely hard to master” his eyes narrowed, “there is a huge amount of chakra needed to travel dimensions, so great that the user will either die in the process or die in the dimension he could not choose”.

“Yeah, still I did it” you shrugged, finishing the second plate and leaning back satisfied.

He stared at you a mix of confusion and indignance at your causality at the whole matter. “Let’s stop this talk for now” you sighed. Kakashi took a moment of silence before nodding and taking the dishes to clean them up together with the cooking utensils. Your white eyes lazily watched his figure move through the kitchen.

“Can I meet my past teammates tomorrow?” Kakashi turned to you, surprised at your question.

“Which team?”

“The one you get assigned to after you leave the academy, like your students”.

“To jog your memory?”

“That and meeting, probably, friends” you sighed and rested your forehead on the table. “It is exhausting and frustrating you know? I want to know who I am, what I’ve been through, who my friends are and what I was to you all those years” you groaned. Kakashi dried his hands and removed his mask on the way to your slumped figure.

“Then you need a long rest tonight” he said, his hand moving under your chin and lifting your head slightly to kiss your forehead. “Agreed?” he demanded more than questioned. “If you can resist” you stood up and motioned to your body, “this”.

“I’ll do my best” he chuckled and with a gentle hand on your waist lead you upstairs into the bedroom.

You glanced up at him, “you are going to sleep in a bed as well right?”

He smiled sheepishly.

“You are not taking the couch” you stated, defiantly crossing your arms.

“It’s fine” Kakashi assured you.

You shook your head and poked his ribs, “I’d rather have you sleeping in the same bed than have you sleep deprived”. His eye widened slightly but lit up as he smiled. “Are you sure you want to share the same bed?”

You sighed annoyed at his constant asking of you being sure of things. “Yes Kakabaka, I am sure. I would not have let you inside if I wasn’t. Hell I wouldn’t stay at your house if I wasn’t! I may not have my memories but I know you are the guy I was and am in love with” your finger prodded into his chest while you glared up at his handsome face, “so you better deal with it!”

He chuckled, all worry washing away from his face and his eyes lighting at your statement. “I’m glad” he pulled you into a hug, “you haven’t changed” he whispered.

“’f course” you grunted and wrapped your arms around his torso. “I’m glad too” you whispered barely audible.

After the short embrace he led you to the bed and handed you an oversized short sleeved shirt, which he claimed to be better than sleeping naked. It was probably precautions for his libido though. Nevertheless you changed without any shame. Actually enjoying Kakashi subtly glancing at your naked figure.

Curling up in the blanket, suddenly a pair of warm arms draped around you. you glanced over and smiled as Kakashi acted as the big spoon. “Good night Kakashi” you murmured. “Good night” he whispered and kissed your neck while you closed your eyes and fell asleep to the sound of his even breathing.

“How does she do this every time” the silver haired Jonin grumbles as he patted the empty, cold spot next to him. Downstairs he could hear the stumbling of the cooking utensils. A small smile formed on his lips. He hadn’t felt like this since she left for that mission which should have been her demise. He finally felt a whole again, a broken whole where she was the glue holding him together.

“Good morning, did you have plans with your team today?” you questioned as you noticed the silent shinobi creeping up behind you. He let out a defeated sigh and settled on a hug.

“No, they have the day off, tomorrow we will be going on a mission” he murmured sleepily.

“Then that’s good” you replied, enjoying the warmth running from his arms around your waist. His eye peered over your shoulder, he was fully dressed in a clean attire while you were still in the shirt you fell asleep in. “It will be done in a minute” you responded to his silent question. He gave a small nod and turned heel to the table, letting you go.

“Who were in my old team? I haven’t been able to remember anyone….”

“A man named Might Guy and a man named Ebisu… Ebisu…. I forgot his surname” Kakashi shrugged. You hummed while putting the pancakes on two plates and brought them to the table. “Might Guy…” you muttered, the name tugging at your messed up mind.

“And Ebisu” Kakashi finished, observing your reaction carefully.

“Maybe I know after seeing them” you shrugged, deeming the pancakes more important. He chuckled and with a short thank you for the food, dug into it. Pausing again you looked up, Kakashi frowning at your action. “Who was my team leader?” you asked, mouth still processing the food. “Charming..” he muttered, “Akamichi Chõza”.

_“That’s our sensei?”_

_“(y/n)! how dare you be so disrespectful to our sensei!”_

_You frowned at the boy dressed in black with small sunglasses. “Still can’t believe you are on my team. I envy Rin” you sighed exasperated._

_“You w-”_

_“Don’t you worry (y/n)! I am still here!” a boy with a coconut haircut exclaimed with a blinking smile. Your face scrunched up in distaste at his fashion sense. Who in their right mind wears a green jumpsuit?!_

_“That worries me even more”. The thick eye brow guy dropped down comically at your exclamation._

_Meanwhile Chõza watched on with light amusement and calculation. “I am Akamichi Chõza” he announced, a good hearted smile on his face, “I will be your sensei”. You rolled your eyes, someone who doesn’t even try to defend himself has no business ordering you around._

_“Something wrong (y/n)?” he questioned in that fatherly like tone. Your eye twitched in annoyance. Loosening your arms from their crossed position you stood up glaring defiantly at the big man. “Yes. I don’t see why I am placed with these idiots and with a sensei who doesn’t suit my fighting style or character!”_

_Behind those gentle eyes there was something cool and calculating. Your instincts told you to take a step back, but as the foolish child you was you didn’t._

_“(y/n)-”_

_“Shut it Eyebrow!” you snapped turning to the less threatening boy. He frowned and stepped up, but stopped in his tracks as a fist landed on your head._

_With a whine you held your sore head, glancing grudge fully up at the sensei. “That’s enough, go sit down. We will continue the introductions and I will not tolerate any interruptions” he said, a dangerous edge to his gentle voice. Swallowing the lump in your throat you reluctantly moved back to your seat and sat down. “Now, you will state your name and the dream you want to achieve”._

You blinked in surprise. Kakashi looked expectantly at you. “I really was a joy to have around” you huffed sarcastically. Kakashi chuckled, “you don’t even know half of it”. You rolled your eyes at that comment but didn’t retort back.

“Kakashiii! Holing her for yourself is the most dishonourable thing you have ever done!” Your head snapped to the window before looking at Kakashi.

“Who is that noisy guy?” you questioned, seeing someone outside through the wall.

“That” the silver haired male laughed nervously, “is Might Guy”. Sighing, you stood up and walked calmly through the front door. Your eyes widened and your arms protected your head from a flying drop kick. “Kakashi you- (y/n)!” Guy exclaimed as he landed on his feet, giving a sparkling smile. “Excuse me for that, I thought you were Kakashi” he said, not really looking all that sorry.

You frowned and swatted your arms to get the tingling feeling from the kick away. Something told you that he had held back.

“It isn’t his fault he holed me up” you stated dryly, “I just didn’t remember you, Ebisu and Chõza since a few minutes ago”. The raven haired male gaped at your exclamation, tears at the rim of his eyes.

“H-how could you? We were partners! Teammates!”

“Give her a break Guy” Kakashi appeared behind you, putting a comforting hand on your shoulder. The guilt disappearing as soon as it had appeared. “She lost all her memories from before we presumed her dead” he explained calmly.

“What tragedy!” Guy exclaimed grasping the air while tears stream down his face. “(y/n) forgive me for the sudden outburst. I am Might Guy, your partner, teammate and best friend!” he introduced himself.

Was he always this loud? From the little memory you received it was clear that he had way to much energy. But still, this is a little over the top. Feeling a bit uncomfortable with his familiarity you shuffled a bit closer, much to Kakashi’s delight. “Sorry I just have on memory and that is on the team introduction… not really the best impression” you sighed apologetic.

“No worries, I am sure going out with me will jog up your memory!”

You could feel Kakashi’s muscles tense for a small second. Frowning you glanced up at the silver haired man. He looked bored, as usual. Is he hiding something?

“Go out?” you questioned, turning to Guy.

“Yes! Like in the old days. We could go train!” he said, excitement clear in his eyes. A smile tugged at your lips. That sentence could have different interpretations, depending on his ulterior motives. He didn’t seem smart enough to have those though. “I’m free today. All days actually, until my memory is back” you mused.

“Splendid!” Guy exclaimed, “I will race you to the training grounds. Ebisu should be there as well!” He laughed before bending his knees, as if waiting for a start shot. Understanding his intention you smirked and imitated the pose. “Rrreaady… START!” Guy yelled and began running. You laughed while running after him, leaving a stunned Kakashi behind.

That Guys was crazy fast. Sure you kept up but your longs began to burn and your muscles protest. Your body found relieve when you finally halted in the middle of an open grass field. Guy jogged on the spot while you bend over and gasping for air. Your throat burned while your brain pleaded for fresh oxygen. “It seems your speed hasn’t changed, but your stamina could use some work” Guy puffed. He stopped jogging and began stretching his limbs. When your breath was even again you stood up straight and looked around. “Where is Ebisu?” you asked, ignoring his obvious observation.

“(y/n)…. I am so glad you are alive!” a unknown voice exclaimed behind you. You turned sharply, just in time to dodge two arms, trying to trap you in a hug. Jumping away from the man dressed in black, a black bandana around his head, with the leaf village symbol on it, and sunglasses.

“You must be Ebisu” you deduced.

His face became crestfallen, “have you forgotten me?”

“Don’t worry Ebisu! She forgot me as well!” Guy laughed.

“That doesn’t help….” Ebisu straightened up and pushed his glasses further up his nose. “I excuse myself for my behaviour. I can just barely believe my eyes. You actually came back from the dead” He said, his hand slightly trembling.

_“I killed her” his hands trembled. His face was pale and his eyes empty. His voice sounded hollow, as if his soul had left him. One empty midnight black eye turned to you. “(y/n)…..” his silver hair hooded his eyes as he hung his head. The anger you had felt moments ago was completely gone at the sight of his broken state._

“(y/n)? is everything okay?” you gasped and swatted the hand moving in front of your face away. “Y-yeah” you stammered. Ebisu frowned and crossed his arms, “you never were a good liar”.

“I am fine!” you snapped.

His expression turned soft as he reached out for you, “(y/n)-”. His hand was swatted away and you looked up to see the masked man from your memory.

“I am sure you like to catch up Ebisu, but would you refrain from touching her casually? She does not know who are friends and foes” Kakashi stated coldly. One arm was protectively around your waist while the other leaned over your shoulder, ready to swat Ebisu’s hand away again. His presence oddly calming. Something did tug at your mind and made your stomach drop. Who did Kakashi kill?

“Do you have any right saying that while holding her so inappropriately!” Ebisu retorted.

“I already established a relationship with her, without use of her memories” Kakashi stated, his eyes seeming bored but his tense arm revealed his protectiveness of you.

Deciding to intervene this stupid discussion you shrugged his arm off and patted the tall Jonin’s head. “Thanks, but I can still fend for myself” you grinned. “Do you even remember how to fight?” Kakashi mused. You rolled your eyes, his smug grin revealing that he knew he was spot on. “My body knows more than my mind”. You turned to Ebisu with a gentle smile and held a hand out, “the hugs will be postponed for when I remember our friendship. For now it’s nice to meet you again” you said. Ebisu looked pained but smiled nevertheless, taking your hand.

“Ah what youth! Our old team back together!” Guy exclaimed appearing between you and Ebisu. A smile crept on your lips. “Yeah. So… training?” you questioned. Guy nodded excited and out of bodily instinct you jumped back and took up an offensive fight stand. Guy and Ebisu eyed you before grins appeared on their faces and they mirrored.

“AND START!” Guy shouted. You engaged in an intense Taijutsu fight with Guy and Ebisu. Ebisu was pretty predictable, he tended to stick to certain patterns and use them with slight variations. Guy on the other hand was really skilled. Landing a blow was next to impossible with defending yourself from him and Ebisu.

Kakashi watched lazily from the side-line, hands in his pocket. His eyes mostly focused on your movements.

The fight lasted for a long, exhausting hour. After which you took distance with a few backflips. Guy, the straightforward idiot that he was, ran after you, not done with the fight just yet. Mid the second flip your eye saw him approaching. While your mind turned to panic everything slowed down for your feeling, your body moving on its own. You finished your flip and while doing hand signs you turned to Guy, placing your hands on the ground. “Water style: Geyser!” you yelled. Guy yelped as the geyser appeared exactly on the spot he put his foot, making him shoot up into the air.

Panting you dropped on your but and watch Guy land smoothly with a few flips, probably to show off. Guy smiled broadly, “great job in stopping my attack!”

“It was clear I couldn’t fight any longer, don’t push me” you grunted annoyed, your longs burning.

Kakashi pushed himself of the tree and walked over to you.

“Your enemy wouldn’t have any mercy even if you were tired!” Guy exclaimed.

“Yes, that’s why I don’t look for enemies now!” you snapped glaring at the, way too happy, man. Ebisu pushed his glasses up, must be a habit, and joined in. “Your movements lack precision, you are hesitant and your stamina is way too low” he deduced. A growl rumbled through your throat.

“Shut it. Come talk to me when you have died!” you snarled angrily gripping the grass. Both men paused and looked suddenly like a pair of kicked puppies, realizing their mistake.

“They are just glad you haven’t changed” Kakashi said holding his hand out to you. Scowling you didn’t take it and scrambled up yourself. “Well I wouldn’t know” you grunted annoyed, patting the dirt off your borrowed clothes.

“How about we go for some tea?” Ebisu questioned making us all look up, your scowl melting away. “Your treat?” he gave a firm nod, making you smile. “Then what are we waiting for!” you exclaimed running off to town.

“And suddenly she has energy” Kakashi muttered.

“Ah youth” Guy sighed to himself in delight.

“So, you are now training the nephew of the hokage?” Ebisu nodded, pride clear in his expression, “And you have your own team like Kakashi” you mused. Guy smiled proudly, “genin of top class!”

You Chuckled as he looked challenging at Kakashi while he just sipped his steaming tea. Your hands were wrapped around the old fashioned cup, enjoying the heat. “I wonder if the Hokage will give me my Jonin title back when my memories return”.

“Of co-”

“What makes you think you are a Jonin?” Kakashi interrupted Guy, gaining a frustrated look from the raven. You smirked, “cause I doubt my memory holding self could stand having you guys overtaking me” you mused. “Point taken” he muttered returning to his tea cup which was now empty. How did he do that!

“I hate to say this, but I must be off. I have an appointment to look after Konohamaru” Ebisu excused standing from his seat. You looked up and gave a gentle smile. “Good luck and I’ll see you around”. He smiled at that, “Until next time” he nodded to both men before leaving the café.

“(y/n) you have to meet my team! I’m sure they will be fired up from your expertise!” Guy exclaimed decisively. A nervous smile appeared, “maybe another time, when I actually have any expertise to share”.

Guy frowned, “so be it. I expect you within two weeks. No, one!”

_“I can master this move in one week! No, five days!”_

_You rolled your eyes while lazying against a tree. Guy had been going at that dummy for hours, claiming he had thought of a new technique which you had yet to witness._

_“Doubt it” you sighed, tugging lightly at the headband on your arm. “Just wait and see!” he ventured, his attacks increasing in speed._

_“(y/n)”_

_You looked up and a smile appeared. Jumping up you jogged over to the brown haired girl, purple stripes ran vertically over her cheek from her purple eyes. “Rin! You are late” you scolded._

_She stuck her tongue out, “you are just early” she giggled. Rolling your eyes you turned to the boy in the green jumpsuit. “I’ll be next to this field, I don’t need your sweat stench interfering my training” you shouted._

_“My sweat- Hey!” you laughed, running off with Rin in tow._

You blinked, “yeah, dream on” you mused. Guy looked crestfallen and pouted, “then when?”

“When enough memories return Guy. I don’t know when that is. It’s not like we can’t see each other in that time though” you shrugged. The odd guy immediately cheered up. “I will see you soon!” he laughed, saluting you and nodding at Kakashi before going off as well.

Kakashi eyed you with a knowing look. “Yes, a memory again” you sighed and slumped in your seat. The memory of the graveyard popping up. You had nodded at a grave with a name sounding so familiar. “So she’s dead” you bit your lip, Kakashi leaned in with worried eyes.

“Who?”

You shook your head, not wanting to bother Kakashi until you knew the full story of her. “Nothing yet” you said picking up the teacup and drinking the last bitter sip. He eyed you suspiciously for a moment, sighing in defeat when the memory of your stubbornness crossed his mind.

“Where shall we go now?” he questioned.

“Don’t know…” you sighed, “I think I’ll train on my own until diner”.

“I can help” Kakashi offered but you shook your head.

“I need to figure some stuff out, which I rather do alone”. He looked pained at your decision. “Don’t look like a kicked puppy or I will actually kick you” you grunted. He blinked, a low chuckle rumbling from his chest. “Alright. Be on time for diner” he spoke, standing up. He paid the waiter and saw you out. At the end of the street you parted ways with him. He returned home while you wandered to the graveyard, while keeping check that Kakashi didn’t follow you.

“Hey again…” you stared at the tombstone with a sad smile. “Sorry I didn’t bring any flowers. Next time I will get you some… Those fuchsia lilies! I wonder if they still have them” you mused sitting down in front of the grave. “Hey…. I’m sorry I forgot about you. About everyone. I did keep my promise though, I did remember Kakashi’s name” you looked down defeated. “Sitting here already gives me more information of my past” you murmured and looked back up, your white eyes tracing the letters engraved in stone. “Next time I will bring some sake as well, so we can drink on… on…. I just want to drink with you again, you got me” you chuckled.

“Rin. I miss you” you whispered, tears welling up, “so much”. Your hand covered your mouth, holding back the sounds of your sobbing. Your fist clenching at your side. “Why couldn’t I be there for you?” tears rolled down your cheeks. “Why couldn’t I help? Why did you have to go in a snap. Why did an ANBU person have to tell me, at my doorstep, that you had died!” the screams in your mind formed mere whispers on your lips. “Why..” you looked down, the sense of loss overwhelming your body.

Minutes felt like hours as you sobbed in grief.

When your body finally calmed down you looked up again. “Shinobi never show weaknesses, never show their tears” you recited and shook your head. “They should change it into, a Shinobi only sheds tears to mourn a lost comrade” you huffed. “I bet Ebisu would scold me for that, you would scold him for scolding me” you chuckled. “Say… did I shed a tear when you died? I hope I did, it’s bad to bottle things up” you muttered. “I wish I had much more to tell. I really want to tell you everything that happened. I just can’t… not yet”.

“You already helped me a lot. I think you did that a lot when you lived as well” you sighed standing up. “Next time we drink okay? Upon my return and new found memories” you smiled and trailed the cracks on top of the headstone before leaving the site.

Slapping energy into your cheeks you looked determined towards the destination of the forest. Training would help the most right now. The earlier you are back to full power, the better. Morning runs should be good too.

“And what happened to you?” Kakashi stood with arms crossed, foot tapping in front of you in the hallway of his house.

“I trained” you smiled innocently. Every muscle was sore and it wouldn’t be surprising if your chakra was on its last straw. Kakashi scowled and tapped your head with his spatula. “Diner was an hour ago and you come back as if you just fought in a war”.

“Not a war..” you muttered looking down, your knees trembling with the effort to keep you up. Not a war indeed. Whatever it was, you barely believed it yourself. The moment you tried to imagine an enemy you felt your chakra draining. Several creatures appeared out of seemingly nowhere. The positive was, you were able to get to full knowledge of your powers, the negative was that it was at the cost of nearly all of your chakra.

Kakashi took in your appearance, his clothing hanging in ribbons on your body, slashes marring your beautiful skin and your muscles trembling in effort to just stand.

A yelp escaped your lips when a pair of strong arms scooped you up. “Hey! I can walk!” you snapped, but had no energy to struggle. “You can barely stand” he deadpanned, “honestly, you just came back from the dead 2 days ago and you are already working yourself back into the grave”.

“For your information, 3 months have passed since I woke up back in this dimension” you growled crossing your arms. He looked down on you, he tried to keep his expression blanc as usual but the regret combined with blame was visible. It was like a hole opened in your stomach, an unsettling feeling that was even worse than hunger.

He carried you up the stairs and gently put you on the bed before beginning to strip you. Not saying a word. As the pants were gone and he started on your shirt you growled. “Can’t you snap at me? I rather have that than your silent treatment”. He looked up at you, his eyes saying enough about his state right now. A sigh escaped your lips, while your arms reached out and pulled him into a close hug. “You can play stoic dickhead all you want. I know you worry” you muttered, “and I know you are frustrated that I didn’t come see you the second I revived. Not that it was possible but I understand”. “(y/n) I-” “And I know you don’t want anything happening to me ever again” you pushed him slightly back to look in his eye. Gently pulling his headband and his mask from his face you smiled. “But you know me better than I do right now. And even I know I won’t stay still”.

Kakashi let out a sigh, his tense muscles relaxing as he dropped himself into your chest. A small smile appeared on your lips while your hands played with the silver strands of his hair. “I don’t have the strength to fight you, so don’t rape me” you mused. His head snapped up with a glare making you chuckle. “You know I would never do that” he growled.

“Yes I know, big bad puppy” you purred petting his head. He scowled at the belittling gesture. “Did you save any food for me?” you questioned. He sighed, getting up and nodded.

“Can’t have you starving” he gave a wink and pulled his mask and headband back in place before leaving for the kitchen. Your eyes following the even strides of his legs.

After having diner devoured on the bed, you leaned back content while Kakashi cleaned up the dishes. As soon as he finished that he came back and sat at your side. “You mind sleeping in the same bed?” he questioned.

You snorted, “after what we did the other day? Do you really need to ask, again?” you mused winking playfully at him. He averted his eyes and sighed, seemingly struggling with something. Ignoring the protests of your muscles you leaned over and hugged his back. “What’s bothering you?” you asked, your head leaning on his shoulder. He turned his head to the side to look at you. “It’s still difficult to believe you are here” he muttered barely audible under his mask. You rolled your eyes and fell back on the propped up pillows. “Nice try, but what is really bothering you?” you huffed. “That is really bothering me” he stated dryly. “Kakashi” you scolded.

“You are not telling me everything-” you opened your mouth but he glared, shutting you up, “as much as this sounds like a busy body. I want to know what made you all beat up like that. And I want to know what you remember, since some things could come back in a different order than it happened…” he looked down, his eyes softening, “it could give you the wrong idea”.

“Of you?” you questioned leaning slightly towards him. He nodded silently.

You took a deep breath. “I already know that Rin dying wasn’t to blame on you”. Kakashi’s eyes widened as his muscles tensed.

“You-”

“Let me explain. Sorry I’m interrupting you a lot” you smiled sadly, brushing a strand of hair out of your face. “The first memory of her… rather you, was you broken in the corner of your room. Saying that you killed her. I can remember the anger I had felt disappearing” you spoke softly, “at that time I didn’t know who you were talking about in my memory. But when I received a memory of Rin I went back to the graveyard” a breathy chuckle left your lips, “it was like Rin was making me remember a lot. About my old team, your old team…” you shook your head, “it’s a bit hard to order the memories, even now”.

Kakashi’s muscles were still tense, his eyes had turned normal though. “Do you remember our promise?” he asked softly. You blinked, “no… I know I promised Rin to look after you though”. His muscles slowly relaxed as he pulled his glove of, revealing the same tattoo as yours but on the opposite hand. “The same…. If you put it together…” you muttered pulling your glove off and fist bumping him, “you get a cross”.

He nodded, “it was something you came up with. Two halves of something we need to remember” he said, his other hand gently placed under the fist bump. His fingers caressing yours ever so lightly. “A promise that we will remind each other of our lost ones and always come back to do so” his voice was silvery as if telling a story. A smile tugged at your lips. “Well, I kept that promise now” you grinned looking up at him. He smiled under his mask, “you did”.


	4. Panic

The clock chimed eleven when the glass of wine was empty. The girl’s cheeks were tainted with a deep shade of red. Her white eyes seemed hazy as she stared at nothing. The guy opposite of her paid the waiter with a big smile. The old man, taking the money, seemed concerned for the state of his female customer but the raven haired man assured him that he would see her home.

Not like she needed any protection.

“Come on (y/n) let’s go” Guy said stretching a hand out towards the intoxicated girl. She glanced up from his hand to his face and a grin spread across her features.

“Go where?” her voice seemed normal, if it weren’t for her appearance you would think she wasn’t drunk.

“I will bring you home” a sudden realisation hit him. He didn’t know where she resided. Postponing that question for later he helped the girl up who swayed slightly with every step.

“Good night Taishou! I’ll come back sometime!” she chimed. “You are welcome any time” he smiled gently and held the door for both guests open.

“Where are we going?” the girl looked up at the man walking beside her. His eyebrows were disturbingly big, it didn’t help that they danced in her vision.

“We are here!” Guy exclaimed as they arrived upon the training grounds. She frowned looking around in the darkness of the grass field. Several dummies and logs were discarded over the place, all damaged but still intact.

“This is not where I can sleep” she stated confused and turned to Guy who had a big grin on his face. “(y/n)!” she flinched, “you know what I’ve heard?” the man grinned, oh so proud of himself that he thought of something that would piss her off.

The girl tilted her head, waiting for his answer. “Kakashi has been going to love hotels for the last month, every week a new girl” he exclaimed.

The girl blinked. “He what?” her voice was ice cold, she was smiling but it didn’t reach her empty eyes. “He went into love hotels with differ-” he groaned as his face was met with the sole of her shoe. Her eyes, once hazy, were now laced with fury. Guy did a few backflips and wiped his sore cheek with a accomplished grin. The girl landed with a backflip. If looks could kill, Guy would be 6 feet down. A nervous sweat broke out but that didn’t stop him from charging at her.

Drunkenly swaying the girl dodged every attack the bushy eyebrowed man threw at her. Frustration building up in the man had him yelling war cries with every attack. Suddenly the girl began to fight back, fist met with fist and his leg was blocked by her arm. In a mere moment his leg was grabbed and used to lift him up and throw him towards a tree. The man turned mid air and bounced off the tree, charging back towards the girl. He barely followed the hand signs made by the girl but it had him skidding to a halt and bracing for the worst. A pillar of earth erected beneath him, firing off into the air. He laughed as he used his momentum to fall with a drop kick towards the girl.

A small smile let him know, that was the moment he screwed up. Crackling echoed through the night air, followed by a yell of agony from Guy. He fell to the ground, barely able to land on his feet after being hit by the lightning. He glanced up at the girl who still seemed dead serious on hurting him.

Maybe he should have told her to make this an only Taijutsu fight? Nonsense! That would keep the spirit of her youth hidden! Now she was coming with everything she got.

At least, that’s what Guy thought.

He had no moment to recover from the paralysis the lightning caused as she charged at him with a raised fist. He had never expected her to be this unpredictable and skilled. He knew she was good, but not this good.

He braced himself for the impact that never came. Instead a groan echoed through the silent night.

The girl blinked and stared at the man she had just hit. “I am so sorry, I meant to hit tha- Kakashi you Motherfucker!” she yelled angrily making hand signs but stopping in the middle of her series to sway on her feet.

Kakashi slowly rose from the spot where he was punched into the ground. “What’s going on?” he questioned, his voice dangerously low, causing shivers to run along the girls spine. She dropped her hands next to her body and glared from Kakashi to Guy and back. “Kakashi! You interrupted our youth!” Guy exclaimed dismayed. “And what” Kakashi’s head snapped to Guy, his one visible eye glinting dangerously, “is this Youth?” he sneered. Guy stood straight, his hands on his sides, his legs slightly parted while a big grin appeared on his face, “why a duel of course!”

The girl turned to him, confusion clear on her face. “Duels are stupid” she growled and shook her head, her body swaying by the disorientation it caused. Kakashi got up and prowled towards Guy who seemed oblivious to the dangerous aura surrounding the Jonin.

A sudden hand in his hair had the silver hair stop in his tracks. “So fluuuuffy” she chimed, both her hands were messing up his spikey hair. The man looked confused at first but then glared at Guy, “what did you do to her?” he growled.

“I fed her and gave her alcohol” he said proudly. Kakashi wanted to snap at the man but was stopped as he patted his shoulder, “I shall leave her in your care now! I bid you good night!” he exclaimed before challenging himself to a ridiculous goal to get to his house within a minute. Kakashi cursed under his breath, barely audible beneath his mask.

He turned to the girl and frowned. “Why did you leave the hospital before I came?” he asked as calmly as possible, but he wasn’t able to hide the edge in his voice. The drunken girl laughed sheepishly, her eyes focused on the fluffy hair a head higher than her. “I got free food” she chimed. Kakashi stepped back only for her to growl and jump at him, her hands back in his hair.

With a defeated sigh he scooped her into his arms. It took a few seconds for realisation to dawn on her. Her white eyes glanced up at the seemingly stoic male, oblivious to the rage building up inside of him. “Let go, I can walk fine” she stated calmly. “No you can’t. Just this morning you got discharged. You should rest” he chided.

A frown creased her features. “I said let go”.

“No”, he kept on walking.

“Let go” she repeated. Kakashi didn’t even make the effort to answer her anymore.

An upper cut straight to the jaw had Kakashi grunt and let the cause go. She turned mid air like a cat and flipped back, creating distance between her and the silver haired Jonin. His lazy eye turned to the girl, faint annoyance flickering. “You! don’t think I didn’t forgot what ya did!” she slurred, her voice becoming less clear. He arched a brow in confusion. “What exactly did I do?” he asked, crossing his arms. “You had sex with other girls!” she yelled angrily, her head becoming a deeper shade of red. “Who told you that?” Kakashi asked, the edge from earlier back into his voice. “Guy told me!”

Something snapped inside of the man.

The girl glared at the silver haired Jonin, but it wasn’t with hate. Disappointment and sadness filled her eyes, anger flickering between these two.

Kakashi took a deep breath. Normally he had no issue with controlling his emotions, but right now. He wanted to kick Guy where the sun never shone. However, that had no priority as the girls stare burned into his body. “(y/n) you have to listen to-”

“No” she yelled, her foot stamping on the ground. “No excuses!” tears threatened to fall, her fist balling into fists. Kakashi opened his mouth to say something but she was already charging for him. He barely avoided being pierced by her chakra scalpel. Even in a situation like this he had admiration for the woman. Her chakra control was nearly flawless, even in her drunken state.

“(y/n) he lied!” Kakashi snapped. Said girl whirled around and the betrayal in her eyes was replaced by confusion. “Eh?” she tilted her head. Curse her for being cute, yet lethal.

“Guy told that lie” he paused, the gears clicking in place, “to get you to fight him”.

She frowned, “why does he want to fight me?”

“Because he likes a challenge, though I still don’t understand why he fed you drunk” he said, slowly relaxing his muscles but not letting his guard down just yet.

Slowly she ceased her offensive stand and looked teary eyed at Kakashi. “So you are not having sex?” she whimpered. Anger seemed to melt at the sight of this girl so sad with the idea of him sleeping around. A small smile formed on his lips. “The only one for me is you” he answered, his silvery voice echoing through her head. “Really?” her eyes were filled with hope. Kakashi rolled his eyes and walked over to her. With her big white orbs she looked up, looking like a lost kitten. “Don’t doubt my resolution” he muttered petting her head. She leaned into the touch, a low humming sound leaving her throat.

“Let’s head home” he said and kissed the top of her head through the mask. “The questions I have can wait till tomorrow” he sighed.

She glanced up at him. “Questions?” she didn’t move from her spot, waiting for Kakashi to elaborate. “Why you disappeared and appeared, out of chakra, for Guy to find” he summed causally but there was frustration lingering in that statement. She slowly fell into pace besides Kakashi. “I don’t know how Guy found me” she mused, “but I was in a really weird place with purple mist and shadowy figures and no oxygen and-”

“We will talk about it tomorrow (y/n)” Kakashi interrupted making the girl pout and look away. “I’m just glad you are okay” he whispered, taking her hand in his. A goofy grin appeared on her lips as you looked at the intertwined hands.

Something what felt like seconds were actually half an hour, it was only at the front door that the girl realized they had arrived at Kakashi’s house. After she entered the house with Kakashi, he turned and pulled lightly to retrieve his hand from her hold but the girl refused to let him go. He sighed defeated and struggled with one hand to lock the door. “Let’s get you some water” he stated, turning to the kitchen. Her eyes followed the movements of his muscles that were visible through his turtleneck sweater. A smile crossed her lips before she jumped on his back. Kakashi, barely faced with the sudden weight looked over his shoulder. “Now you can’t walk anymore?” he mused.

“Can but won’t” she purred, her legs wrapped around his waist while her elbows rested on his shoulders, her hands playing with his hair.

The man chuckled and went into the kitchen, filling a big bottle with water and then turned to the bedroom. There he stood still. “(y/n), can you get off? It will do us both good to sleep” he spoke gentle, using the word both to avoid any protest. The girl seemed to think for a while. Her head was hazy and it was difficult putting the thoughts in the right order. Kakashi’s patience seemed endless as he waited, standing in the middle of the room.

With a definite nod the girl looked satisfied with her decision and descended from Kakashi’s back onto the ground. With a sigh Kakashi began to strip off his sweater. “I’m going to shower” the girl stated before disappearing into the bathroom. “Okay- Wait you-” Kakashi groaned and darted after the girl.

He glared down on the girl. The second she had been in there she had poured a bottle of soap empty into the bathtub and was now fidgeting with the faucet to get it turned on. “That’s not showering” he stated with crossed arms. “Tomato, Tomàto” she grunted, struggling with the turning knobs. Kakashi rolled his eyes and leaned over, turning the faucet on and picking up the empty soap bottle to throw it away.

As water fell the girl jumped up and squeaked. With a broad smile she was out of her clothes in no time. Kakashi turned to her to find her completely naked stepping into the filling bath. A light blush spread across his cheeks. Of course, they had done the deed and it wasn’t the first time he had seen her strip. But he rarely had the chance to observe her without her obstructing his view one way or another. Her skin looked as smooth as porcelain, only few scars marred her beautiful complexion. Her body was well rounded, not fat but in healthy proportions, filling out in just the right places.

Kakashi snapped out of his staring trance as a pair of glaring eyes burned on his head. His lazy inky eye turned to the girl. “Strip” she demanded.

Kakashi blinked, wondering if he had heard it right. She shifted to sit up straight with room between her back and the bad edge. “Kakashi” she whined annoyed. The silver haired Jonin chuckled and got rid of his clothes, only his mask left on his face as he dropped his toned body behind the girl. His muscled arms draped over her shoulders, his legs forced to spread at her sides to actually fit in the small space she granted him.

A mischievous grin appeared on her lips, something that sparked the wrong thoughts in Kakashi’s mind. She leaned back against his torso, her smooth skin against his firm chest. Her hands laid on his legs while she strained her neck to look into his eyes. “You are soft” she mused, before turning around, water splashing around at the action. Kakashi frowned as she approached. Her hands walking up his legs while her legs were between his. It wasn’t like the man was embarrassed by showing his private parts. The uneasiness that settled in his body came from something else. Guilt that ate away at his mind.

“And handsome” she purred, her hands moving up his abs, her face closing in. “And kind” she purred as her finger pulled his mask from his neck, up over his head. “And sweet” her breath felt hot against his lips. His muscles tensed to restrain himself from jumping her, from pulling her close into a passionate embrace. She leaned further down, her lips pulling at his bottom lip.

A frustration welled up in the woman as he had no visible reaction. Taking his lip between her teeth a soft groan left his lips and she could feel his member twitch against her leg. A devious grin adorned her lips as she pulled him in closer, closing her eyes and moving her lips against his.

The male couldn’t help kissing the cute woman back. His callused hand running down her spine. A delightful shiver running through her body. Her eyes opened slightly to reveal the lust swirling in them.

His hands moved back up to her shoulders and gently pushed her away. A protesting whine left her lips, her arms still around his back, determined to keep him close. “(y/n)” he spoke, her attention snapping up to him. “How far do you intend to go with this?” he questioned softly, wondering why he didn’t straight out reject her assertiveness. She frowned and sat back on her haunch. “How far?” she tilted her head cutely. Kakashi nodded and straightened a bit, trying to keep his mind of the beautiful body before him. “Don’t know, don’t care” she shrugged and leaned in again, only to have two firm hands holding her on distance. “(y/n) you are drunk” he stated. “I am n- so what if I am” she rephrased herself, rationality returned enough to know that denying her drunken state would cause him to shut down completely. “I am not going to do anything to a woman who can’t think clear for herself” he stated definite. Even though his eyes told a different story.

A growl rippled over her lips. “I can think fine. Right now I think I want to push you down”. She launched at the male, only to pin a towel to the bathtub edge. “Real mature Kakashi” she growled, throwing the towel away. Kakashi stood next to the bath and sighed at the glowering little kitten stuck in the bathtub. “I am serious (y/n)” he persisted but she merely crawled out of the bath. “Kakashi~” she purred, looking up at him with a devious grin.

“No” was all he said before he took towels and forcefully wrapped the woman inside of them. Her dazed mind refraining from kicking his ass. When she actually realized what was going on she was already wrapped in 10 towels and hoisted over his shoulder. “Kakashi let me go!” she slurred wriggling in his hold.

With a sigh he put the girl down on the bed and proceeded in wrapping her in the blanket. Safety precautions. She squirmed and growled but after half an hour she had exhausted herself and was sleeping as if nothing happened. Tiredly Kakashi dried himself off and put on some underwear before he dropped down next to the knocked out woman. His back facing her as he fell into a light slumber.

Pounding echoed between your ears. Every echo leaving a stab of pain its wake. With a groan you reached up to sooth the pain in your head. However, your hands never reached their destination. Groggily your eyes opened. They needed a few seconds to adjust to the incoming sunlight, the pounding in your head protesting at the sudden lack of darkness. “Why am I-” you groaned and squirmed in the restraints wrapped around your body. It was tight, hot and sweaty. You eyes suddenly fell on the still resting man.

Twitching and turning had your body in a caterpillar position. A strong kick was all it took to fire your torso up and landing on the peaceful resting Kakashi. He groaned and glanced up, his mask covering most of his face but it was clear that he was not amused by the way you awoke him. “Hey… last thing I know I was” you paused to let the pounding in your head subside, “in the bath. What happened?” you questioned, looking clearly confused as to what you had done to deserve being restrained.

Kakashi groaned as he sat up, you rolled onto his lap in the process with a grunt of pain in the head. “You tried to rape me” he stated dryly, carefully lifting you into a sitting position and began unwrapping you.

“No seriously, what happened?” you asked, not believing his statement. He sighed and eyed you tiredly.

“You came on to me and didn’t back down” his eyes turned to the blanket he was unwrapping.

“I’m sorry? Why didn’t you go into my teasing?” you questioned confused, since you both were in a relationship. Right?

“I am not laying my hands on someone intoxicated” he stated matter-of-factly. You hummed, watching him unwrapping you, layer by layer. A light curiosity was sparked at the fact that he was wearing his mask again. It was odd, when you woke up he wasn’t wearing it. Or was he? Maybe the headache was playing tricks on you.

A small smile appeared on your lips, looking adoringly at the gentleman, carefully unwrapping you without stirring your body. “Thank you”. He waved it off as if it was nothing to him.

He unwrapped you till the last towel that covered your body, there he stopped and stood up. “What are the plans for today?” you asked, hoping it was nothing so the headache could slowly settle down in peace. “You will tell me what happened” he glanced over his shoulder. A drop of sweat run down your back at his stare. It seemed his usual bored one, but underneath you could see his frustration, anger. “Yeah” you whispered looking down dejectedly. “Can we-”

“We will do it over breakfast” he stated, knowing you would ask about that. With a grateful nod you stood up and walked over to Kakashi’s closet, stealing a turtle neck and a pair of jeans, which you had done for the past month. Even though you had clothes of your own, his clothing was a lot more comfortable, and his scent calmed your nerves which sometimes acted up.

Kakashi was already downstairs when you finished pinning your hair out of your face. You took this chance to look into the bathroom for any damage. Relieve filled you when there was no broken stuff. Vague memories of drunken episodes in the past had told you that you were a violent wasted person.

With steady steps you descended the stairs and looked around the wall of the doorpost to see Kakashi preparing pancakes in silence. Your stomach grumbled causing the Jonin to turn around. “Eat something before you take the pills” he stated and dropped one pancake on a plate at the bar. Your eyes followed him and realized that two pills and a glass of water stood next to the plate. “Thank you” you whispered gratefully for the outlook of relieve from pain.

After taking a seat you took small bite of the sweetened pancake. Kakashi didn’t seem bothered by your presence as he continued as if your weren’t present.

“I’m sorry for yesterday, for whatever I did that I can’t remember”, a sudden realisation hit you like a slap across the face, “and sorry for doubting you by someone else’s words”. Your eyes cast down while guilt filled your very being.

“You are very susceptible for what people tell you when intoxicated” he turned around with two full plates and put one in front of him, across from you, at the bar and the other was poured on your half empty plate. “So that, I blame on Guy. What I would like to know is: Why did you leave the hospital without me knowing?” his voice was low, as if he tried to hold back on revealing more of his emotions.

“I didn’t think much of it” you admitted guiltily, your hand reached for the pill but decided against it and looked up at Kakashi, “Guy offered to treat me to diner. I hadn’t really thought of…. How worried you would be”. Kakashi’s stare became harsh, “you hadn’t thought of how you disappeared into nothing? (y/n) I searched for hours only for Guy to tell me you were brought to the hospital in life threatening situation” his voice rose as he spoke. You swallowed and shrunk on your seat. “I’m sorry” you whispered.

Kakashi took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of his nose. “How did you end up like that?” you could have imagined it but it felt like there was and undertone of regret in his voice. “I was dimension hopping”. Kakashi opened his eye, confusion apparent mixing with frustration. “Dimension hopping?”

“That’s what Kuro called it. I was suddenly in the snake dimension with no way of breathing. I barely managed to summon Kuro to supply oxygen” you took a deep breath, your hands fidgeting in your lap. The pounding of the headache increased, making it more difficult to speak. You focused on the chipped wood of the table edge. Unconsciously wondering if he had used it to open up beer bottles. You spoke, “I don’t know how long I was there. Time seemed irrelevant as shadows moved around us. Somehow, by recalling the feeling of going to that place I managed to come back, using all of my chakra in the process” you sighed and closed your eyes, scared to look up, to meet his eyes. “Guy told me he found me” you concluded.

The silence felt tense, like a simple provocation could snap it. At least, it felt like that to you.

“I am glad you are alright” Kakashi finally spoke. Your head snapped up, his features were gentle and relieve filled both of you. The pounding headache slightly subsided. Taking this as a sign you took the pill and swallowed it, gulping water behind it.

A pair of warm arms surrounded you. You glanced over to the side to find Kakashi’s head resting on your shoulder. “Are you feeling better?” he asked softly. You chuckled and leaned into his touch. “Keep holding on and I might” you mused. A low chuckle rolled of his lips and made a feeling of comfort settle.

After a while of just enjoying each other’s presence, Kakashi let go and went to his plate. You straightened and began eating as well.

After breakfast you helped Kakashi clean the utensils.

“I think I’ll visit the Hokage today” you stated while drying a plate. Kakashi looked up with light surprise, “are enough memories returned?” You nodded with a small smile, “enough to get back to work. I can’t live off of you forever. I also need to think of moving out”.

A loud clatter had your head snapping up. Kakashi calmly bowed down and picked up the pieces of the shattered plate. You kneeled and reached out to help him but he put his hand on yours with a gentle smile. “I got it” he said before returning to picking them up. “I understand you don’t want to sit around and wait for all your memories. But how come you want to move out?”

You watched his hands move. “I want to have my own spot, my own place” you stated shrugging. Kakashi nodded slowly, as if he had difficulty accepting your reason. He stood up and wrapped the pieces in paper towels before throwing them in the trash bin. You stood up as well and ruffled his hair. “Don’t worry, even if I’m not here you will see me plenty” you teased. He rolled his eyes and returned to the dishes to finish it all up. “Don’t you have to go to your team?” you questioned. He gave a reluctant shrug. “I’ll be 2 hours to late in half an hour”.

You rolled your eyes. “Thanks for the breakfast. I’ll be off” you smiled. When he turned to you to say goodbye you stood on your toes and kissed his lips. “I’ll see you tonight”.

“Till tonight” he smiled. You turned heel and after changing in your own clothes you left the house for the Hokage office.

It took 47 minutes and 30 seconds before you were allowed to enter the Hokage’s office. At the sight of you a small smile appeared on the old man’s face. “(y/n), it is good to see you” he folded his hands over each other. “Same here Hokage-sama”.

“How are you feeling? I heard you were admitted in the hospital with a critical condition” he questioned a hint of concern in his voice. “Something happened, but next time it does it will end better” you gave a reassuring smile, but he didn’t seem too convinced with that. Nevertheless he trusted your judgement and let the matter rest, instead he questioned if your memories had returned already. “Not everything, I still have big gaps, but I know enough to return to work” a smile tugged at your lips. The old seemed relieved and rummaged through his desk, grabbing a few forms. “I would like you to read these thoroughly before signing them. When these are handled you can take missions again” he explained. You nodded and took the papers, scanning over them. They seemed regular, explaining the risks and the terms of employment. You sat back down and began to read through them. The Hokage smiled gently, understanding you wanted to handle it as soon as possible and just continued on his own paperwork until you had finished reading.

Taking the laid out pencil you signed underneath it. It was good to know that your rank of Jonin had not changed. The exams weren’t that much fun to take part in, especially if you have to take Chunin exams. Surrounded by children way under your level wasn’t on your wish list.

“Thank you Hokage-sama” you said dutifully with a light bow. He chuckled, “you are welcome. Have a good day”. Taking that as a dismissal you said a polite goodbye and left the office.

“(y/n)! Are you here to join me on a mission of youth!” an obnoxious voice greeted you. Memories of yesterday had your gut boil with annoyance. Turning towards Guy with a sinister smile you spoke, “No, definitely not”.

Faster than a second your fist met his gut, causing him to double over and gasp for air. “And that is for yesterday” you huffed, striding past him towards the mission locket.

Putting the slip of approval from the Hokage on the table you smiled. “I would like to get back to work”. The brown haired Chunin looked up at you and gave a gentle smile. His brown hair was bound in a pony tail, high on his head. The signature forehead protector sat on his head and a scar ran horizontal over his nose. “Ah (y/n) good to see you again” he smiled. Panic fluttered inside your mind, wondering if you could, once again, not remember an old friend.

Seeing you panic he waved his hand in dismission, “Kakashi came by earlier and informed me about your condition” he reassured you. That didn’t help the unsettling feeling to leave though, the fact that you didn’t remember him stayed.

He rummaged through some documents until he found one and slide it towards you. “D rank mission? You do realize I am a Jonin, right?” you frowned looking at the form.

“Yes, but since you were only released from the hospital yesterday this is the most appropriate mission to get you used to working again” he said, still with a sweet smile. You, however, glowered at the paper while picking it up. “And who concluded that?”

“Kakashi” the man answered. You suppressed a groan of annoyance. “Thank you” you forced a smile, “I didn’t catch your name yet though”.

“Oh, I didn’t realize you didn’t remember me. I’m Iruka, in the past you helped me training whenever you had time to spare”. The smile turned genuine, “nice to meet you again”.

He nodded, “success” he motioned to the mission in your hand. With a mocking salute you left the mission office.

The mission was basically finding a cat that walked away from its owner. Shouldn’t be that difficult. You bend your knees and fired yourself off to a roof and looked over the grand city. “This will take a while” you sighed, realizing the cat could be anywhere. The cat’s name was Tora, ironically since it meant Tiger. The cat was a female and brown-haired. A black stripe ran from its head down to its tail, three stripes ran straight through it on his head. She should be recognizable by a red ribbon on her left ear. “If I was forced to wear that I would run too” you mused.

_“If I was forced to wear that I would run too” you mused. “Even so, a cat should stay with its owner!”_

_“That’s what you deem right Ebisu, not what the cat deems” you huffed. Said boy tipped his glasses a bit higher up his nose._

_“Let’s catch that youthful cat!” Guy exclaimed. Your eyebrows scrunched up at his energy._

You chuckled at the memory. “Guess history repeats itself” you mused. Quick hand signs and a small drop of your blood caused a puff of smoke to appear. “What do you need me for Milady?” a bored voice yawned. “We need to find an old acquittance. At least, I think it is” you said looking down on the black cat. His golden eyes looked up at you, interest flickering across them. “Who might that be?”

“Tora”.

“Ah Tora, a beauty if I may say so. Her chocolaty brown fur really brings out her amber eyes” he mused, his tail twirling. You rolled your eyes. “I take you can find her?”

“Find her? What do you take me for? A dog?” he hissed. You rolled your eyes at his antics.

“Kuro, you know you are way better than any dog”.

“And you know it” he huffed and stood up. Just as he wanted to run off he stopped and looked back up at you. You arched a brow in question, “something wrong?”

“I should be the one asking that. Is something bothering you?” he asked curiously.

“Yeah…. How did you-”

“Know? Well Milady, your eyes seem to have lost their lively spark” he stated expertly. You sighed defeated, “I realized that I forgot someone… again. And he seemed really nice” your shoulders slumped at the thought of the brown haired Chunin.

“You could always retrieve your memories” he shrugged, already losing interest on the matter.

“I am trying to regain them you know!” you snapped.

“I meant going back to my home. The elders probably can retrieve them for you” he said, his eyes narrowing at your outburst.

“….. They can do that?” you looked stunned at the midnight black creature.

“Yes, probably”.

“And why did you never inform me? 8 months have passed since I returned here!” you exclaimed.

A smug smirk appeared on his lips, “you never asked”.

A growl rippled from your lips, “let’s just find Tora and get it over with. The faster this is done, the faster I can go to Mount Nekono” you grunted.

“As you wish Milady” he mock saluted you. “Don’t push me” you growled. His smirk broadened but he wisely held his mouth shut.

“I feel genuinely bad for her” you whispered as the ‘big-boned’ woman smothered her found cat with the love she didn’t want. Kuro flinched at the sight and silently gave his condolence, knowing he couldn’t go through you to save the cat. An unspoken rule among Shinobi: Don’t kill your client.

After filing out the report you handed it to Iruka who gave a gentle smile. “Quick and good, just like old times” he noted.

“Thanks, could you give this note to the Hokage? I will be out town for a while, I don’t know how long it will take”.

The note contained an explanation of your trip. Mainly the goal of recovering your memories, but also the cause of your hospitalisation and how you could be able to fix it there.

Iruka took the paper and nodded, “yes, but how come the sudden leave? You aren’t here for that long and to top that you came out of the hospital yesterday”. You groaned annoyed. Everyone seemed so overly concerned while you felt completely fine. “I am fine. I’ve got to tie up some loose ends. By the time I’m back I’ll probably remember everyone again” you smiled at the thought of being able to recall all your acquittances, friends and family.

Kakashi crossed your mind. A warm feeling fluttered through your stomach of the thought of him being your partner even before you had returned from the dead.

“I wish you luck then” he smiled, putting your note to the side. You gave a joking salute before striding out of the office.

“Don’t you need to inform that other guy?” Kuro’s golden eyes were focused on the road before you. “Which guy?”

“The one you live with” he stated dryly.

“Ah, well he will probably try to stop me. So he can find out from the Hokage” you shrugged, holding a small grudge for being the cause of a boring mission.

“Alright” Kuro shrugged.

“So how will we get to Mount Nekono?” you questioned. Shrouded by the trees you stared into those golden eyes who seemed so bored and reluctant. Even so, the owner always helped you and stayed by your side.

“With your ability to dimension hop. Since you can’t really aim yet I shall guide us” he explained on your shoulder. “So, the same as in the snake dimension? That feeling?” He nodded curtly, his tail flicking impatiently.

You took a deep breath and felt the air flow through your body. Closing your eyes you concentrated on your chakra flow. Slowly but surely you could feel the build-up. When your eyes opened, it released with a burst from your body.

Short rugged breaths had your longs spasm. Your eyes frantically darted form side to side but only darkness filled your vision. Warmth licked at your body like a wet tong of a drooling dog. Your body trembled while your stomach contracted, trying to get rid of something inside.

“(y/n) breath! Damnit, don’t overreact!” a voice had your ears ring. Something warm, fluffy rubbed against your leg. Trying to calm down you focused solely on that sensation. It took a while but that effort paid off. It was like someone whipped tar off a sunscreen before your eyes. Colours flooded your vision. A black spot forming into Kuro who looked annoyed up at you. The ground a dazzling green.

Taking a deep breath your stomach gave one last contraction making you groan and swallow back some bile. Gradually you looked up and took in the surroundings.

It was beautiful. Trees standing taller than any house you had seen. Three houses on top of each other were maybe able to reach the top of the smallest tree. Out of the main tree trunk sprouted branches, which in turn, also sprouted to smaller branches. The leaves cast an orange glow against the sky which was painted which was painted indigo in the centre while the horizon was a combination of heather and magenta purple. Small dots of white adorned the sky like jewellery on a woman, accentuating certain forms in the colour formation. You were standing on an open grass field and oddly enough the smell of pines and oranges filled your senses, even though there were none in sight.

Your breath was caught in your throat. “It’s beautiful” barely a whisper left your mouth. Kuro smirked smugly, “best dimension there is” he puffed his chest proudly. You glanced down, your face still in an expression of shock and adoration.

“I’ll judge that for myself”. His smug expression faltered causing you to chuckle. “So where to now?” you asked looking around once more. Only trees surrounded, they were to densely placed to look farther than two treelines. However, above you could see two rocky points sticking out behind them. Considering their height and closeness, the small rocks would envelope into a mountain if you came any closer.

“We will visit the Masters. They patched you up, so they probably know how to retrieve your memories” Kuro announced, starting to walk into the direction of the mountain.

“Chatty, aren’t we?” you mused, not used to him being anything besides cryptic or blunt. He rolled his eyes, ignoring the statement.

While following the midnight black cat, you didn’t pass on the chance to look around. The forest was brimming with life. Not exactly as in animals. Of course, there was the occasional bird, but what really had the forest alive were the whispers dancing on the wind, the breath coming from the plants and the warm light that looked like dancing figures.

You walked for what could have been hours, the sun could have set but nothing of the sort happened. You glance over at Kuro. “How come the sun hasn’t set yet?” you mused.

“Time here is different, the days and nights are longer than in your dimension. Even so, the days and the nights seem to add up if you return” he explained.

“How does that work?”

“Do I look like an expert in time and dimension?”

“You could be” you retorted. He rolled his eyes annoyedly.

“Each dimension has its own properties. The standard is the things you know from where you came from. My standard is having enough time. Your standards are short lived with short days. We have been walking here for what seems like hours in your dimension time. However, if you would return now only about five minutes should have passed. Capice?”

Your mouth gaped at the gravity of that situation. “So I could train here for hours and then come back with only five minutes passed?!” you exclaimed. He only nodded, getting irritated at your quantity of questions.

“How long was I actually away from my home? Counting in your dimensions properties?” you were almost hesitant to ask. You had little memories of the time here, but judging from the time that had passed when you arrived it was a lot.

“We don’t ‘count’ like you people do in time. So I can’t really tell you in my properties, but give or take 887 year in your dimensions counting system” he shrugged, as if he had just told you what he had for lunch. You stomach dropped. “How am I alive?!” you exclaimed in horror. Your mind having difficulties wrapping around the fact that you were now, instead of 26, 913 years old.

“In your dimension you breath oxygen to keep yourself living. Here you breath another substance we don’t give names for. Long explanation short. Oxygen is real slow poison that deteriorates the body, what you breath here is not poisonous so you do not die” he concluded. Your mouth agape once again. “How do you age? Or grow?!”

“Our bodies work different, we do actually age from being here. Humans don’t” he stated, never once looking at you. “So humans are here immortal?” your voice was barely a whisper.

For the first time since you started walking he turned to you with a sinister glint in his eyes, “you could say that, if you could survive any disease, poison this world has to offer”.

You swallowed the uneasiness of his look away and kept staring straight forward. “Am I in danger by being here?”

“Nah, while the Master healed you, the mistress had fun upping your immune system to adjust to this climate”.

“You say it as if it’s all normal” you grimaced.

He smirked, “it is to me”.

The rest of the way you were silent. Something resembling sunset slowly painted the sky in a midnight black, matching the cat’s fur. Complete darkness enveloped the world and you had difficulty keeping track of where Kuro was walking. He walked loudly on purpose, but that didn’t stop you from stumbling over the occasional root or stone.

“We are here”.

A groan left your lips as you dropped on the rocky ground. About an hour ago the ground began shifting so you had been climbing for a while. “I feel like I walked for two days straight” you stomach grumbled in agreement. If it wasn’t completely dark you could see a light blush tainting your cheeks.

“That is about right” Kuro stated, his footsteps came to a halt. “So, where are we and how can I do anything if I can’t see?” you frowned crossing your arms.

“By being a shinobi?”

“That’s easier said than done. I can manoeuvre without seeing, but it doesn’t mean I’m comfortable with it” you grunted annoyed, slowly getting up again. Your feet ache in protest but you ignored their dull pain. Kuro had began moving again and you followed suit.

“Well?”

“Just wait a bit” he snapped back. You rolled your eyes but indeed waited.

A small light lit before you, a few metres tops. You squinted your eyes to protect them from the sudden orange glow. “Kuro?”

“I said wait” he sighed annoyed.

The light danced in the darkness like fireflies in the night. Suddenly it burst apart and spread out. Your eyes followed one of them until it reached the wall. It was as if they set a mechanism working because suddenly veins of light appeared on the ash grey stone. The whole room was lit and revealed a sight that was once again, breath-taking.

You stood at an entrance made of rocks. It was a rough, ash grey and had silver veins running through it. These veins went in, over the walls and slowly flowed over into the lit up veins lighting the grand chamber. The ground on which you stood was covered by velvet soft moss with an emerald sheen, here and there a flower pushing the green clods away. There were several table like structures made out of stone or pecan coloured wood. No chairs were present.

But gaining the most attention was the giant white feline standing at the far end wall like a statue. Light raising and falling of its chest was the only sign that it was alive. You gaped at the giant creature, its arctic eye turned to you for a small moment. Assessing who you were and what danger you could pose. Apparently he decided on none because the eyes rolled back to stare at the stone wall.

“You are going to catch flies” Kuro’s voice snapped you out of your trance, glaring at his dry remark. “It’s the first time I come here, consciously, let me enjoy” you huffed. He rolled his eyes and began walking over to the giant creature. “Master, it’s good being back” he said with a light bow of the head. You followed after him, wondering why he didn’t look up to the giant creature.

“Welcome back”.

You jumped, startled at the voice coming out of nowhere. Your eyes darted around. “Down here child” the calm voice spoke.

You turned to the creatures paws, only to see something moving from in front of it. Your eyes widened at the black long haired munchkin. “Don’t be rude, bow, thank him. Do something” Kuro hissed looking over to your stunned figure.

As if the hold on you snapped, you bowed. “I thank you for taking care of me! I’m sorry I don’t remember you” you muttered the last part.

“Don’t remember?” a sigh left the munchkins lips. “Take it easy child, sit down” he turned to one of the table like structures, one of wood, “Drewid, fetch some tea and food”. Your head perked up at the mention of tea. “As you wish” out of the shadow of the table appeared a caramel brown cat, twice the size of Kuro who was average size. You turned back to the munchkin. “I’m sorry if I’m rude, but may I know your name?” you looked up at the giant creature, “and hers?”

A gruff snort echoed through the cave. “It’s his, I am Yagul” the large feline spoke and looked down on you.

“He is one of our greatest warriors” the munchkin spoke, “I am Yang. I presume Kuro has told you about your time here?”

“Bits and pieces” you shot a glare at Kuro who stared bored forward, “you are the master that healed me?”

Yang nodded, “I healed your bodily ailments. My sister, Yin, has tended to your mind and soul”.

“My mind and soul?” you arched a brow, “did that need healing as well?”

“Certain things come from near death experience, dimension traveling and dimensions such as ours. You needed to adapt to it” he explained shortly.

“Then is it her doing that I barely remember anything from my life before that accident?”

He looked confused, “you have no memories?” You nodded in response. His white eyes turned to a part of the wall which was not lit up. “IS it your doing?” he questioned. You arched a brow in confusion but said nothing.

“Oh dear brother, I don’t know what you are talking about” a white long haired munchkin appeared from the wall. Her hair, was unlike her brothers, cropped into a modern style. Her starless midnight sky like eyes moved over you. “Oh my, you didn’t tell me we had visitors!” her hips swayed with every step. “I am Yin, right before you in the flesh” she purred sitting back and flipping her bangs to the side. A smile crept on your lips seeing her.

“Could you please cut it out and act your age? You are over 10000 for hell’s sake!” Yang cried, ashamed of the antics of his sister. “Over 10000? She doesn’t look much older than me, maybe younger” you mused. The brother looked dumbfounded at you as Yin’s eyes lit up. “I like her! She was a drag unconscious and battered and all. But now I see it was worth it” she squealed and trotted around you.

“It seems you didn’t do that good of a job sister. She doesn’t remember anything from before the accident” he stated gruffly.

“I remember a little, bits and pieces” you corrected him. Yin hummed and stood in front of you. “Very well, I will retrieve those memories”.

“Don’t tell me you ate more of them on purpose” Yang scolded. Her head snapped around “and what if I did?” she snapped.

His brow arched, not faced by the rage apparent on her face. “You did a very poor job”.

She growled some curses before turning to you with a smile. Kuro looked uneasy between the two of you. “Follow me dear, it will take a bit of time and effort but I can return your memories” she turned around but looked over her shoulder with narrowed eyes. “However, I do warn you. Your memories won’t be pleasant. They will rob you off sleep and cause nightmares in daydreams” she warned.

Anxiety burned in your mind looking at the cat.

‘But I still want them. I need to know. That’s what I came here for’ you concluded. “I still want them”.

The cat ran you over with her eyes before turning to the wall she came from. “Follow me. Kuro, be a dear and stay behind” she turned to the black cat, “you do not want to see it”. Kuro looked from you to Yin and back.

“I wasn’t planning to join” he huffed without interest but the slight trembling in the tip of his tail revealed his sorrows. You chuckled and patted his head. “Thanks Kuro, I’ll be back” you assured him before following after Yin, disappearing through the wall.

The room had the lighting of dawn. The walls were covered with plants beyond imagination. Some oddly shaped, disfigured, in the wildest colours, all hidden within the twilight.

“Lay down” the cat ordered as she jumped on a rock besides a wooden table. You nodded and laid on the wooden table. The cat jumped on your torso and restraints of wood shot out of the table. You glanced at the cat with doubt, wonder and a hint of fear. “Don’t worry dear, just to keep you on the spot. As I said, it won’t be pleasant” the way she purred did not sooth your upcoming nerves.

“Close your eyes, this will take a while” was all you heard before your vision turned black.

Screams echoed, your ears bleed at the pain they caused. Agony filled all your senses. “STOP! Please stop! Someone stop the pain!” the voice that you called your own sounded so foreign to your ears. The screaming began again. Only for you to realize that it was yours. As if hit by an anvil all your muscles jerked. Restraints keeping you from flailing.

There was a far of voice but the words didn’t register. The pain was immense and occupying every sense in your body.

That is. Until everything went black again.


	5. Back home

“Hello dear”.

The voice was silvery. The words echoed through the emptiness of your mind.

“It’s time to wake up now”

It was as if pieces of your body were one by one put together. Gradually the soreness of your muscles registered in your brain. Images began to flood your mind. People spoke to you and it had your lips curl into a smile. Your eyes opened to meet a pair of ink black orbs. “How are you feeling dear?” the white munchkin purred. Slowly you forced your muscles to sit up. The cat jumped off your body, back on the rock.

“Surprisingly great” you rasped. She chuckled, “well, Dewid has tea and food ready for you”. Your eyes lit up at the mention of something warm and filling.

“I would love that”. The cat nodded and jumped off her rock, walking over to the only part of the wall that wasn’t covered in strange plants.

You swept your legs of the edge and carefully placed your weight on your feet. Blinking at the fact your muscles were able to carry you after the whole ordeal had you smiling and following after Yin.

Just as you reached the entrance your breath got stuck in your throat. Grasping in the air to catch something while something flashed before your eyes.

_“Was that everyone?”_

_Your breathing was ragged, pain enveloped your sides and legs where kunais had pierced you._

_“Look here! There is one alive under her dead comrade!” the voice laughed. ‘They found me’ you thought clutching your kunai for dear life._

_The rest gathered around the corpse to take joy in killing the last one alive, you. A war cry released as you jumped up, charging for one of the assailants. Others jumped in to stab you or punch you on lethal spots but even in this state you skilfully dodged it and used substitution to appear behind one, cutting his throat._

_“Bitch!” one snarled. You jumped away as one swiped at you. A cry of pain held back in your throat when you landed on your injured leg. Staggering back to your feet you looked at the attackers. 5 left. Your squad had taken 10 with them to their graves. You could at least take 3 others with you. Even without chakra._

_You were biting and snarling while 3 men held you down. You managed to kill one. The only one not restraining you was wounded. A stab wound in his arm, screwing up his joint, making him unable to use it anymore. “An arm for an arm” he smirked, “and then your life”._

_“Bullshit!” you roared, your voice hoarse. Your eyes darted around to your squad members. Burning each one in your mind._

_Asuko Yagumoto, 29, wife and child_

_Endu Usaro, 21, girlfriend and parents_

_Yusa Amako, 24, friends and parents_

_Their lives forever lost and soon you would follow. It barely registered in your mind as the man cut through your arm with his sword. Only a few seconds later you felt immense pain. Biting on your lips to stop screaming out, you broke skin, blood running down your chin._

_“And now, your life-”_

_His voice fell away and darkness shrouded your very being._

_What had happened?_

You clutched your heart, breathing hard. “Wha-” you coughed, contraction of the stomach caused you to gag. “What happened?” you panted, tears in your eyes as another contraction had you gagging up bile. The muscles in your legs gave in and your other hand scratched over the stone wall.

“(y/n)?!” Kuro appeared through the wall and ran to your side. He eyed you over, stopping at your face. “(y/n)?” he asked, softer this time.

“I am…. I’m okay” you stammered, trying to get up but your muscles wouldn’t obey. He rolled his eyes and sat beside you, his soft fur brushing against your bare leg. “Sure you are” he snorted.

When you caught your breath you turned to the cat. “What happened after I lost my arm?” you asked, eyes still watery.

He glanced up, judging whether you were serious or not. With a sigh he looked away, “you killed them all. When I was summoned you had this…. sinister smile on your face, your eyes completely black. Only for a moment though, then you passed out and almost died” he spoke, the tip of his tail twitching, “blood gushed out of… the hole that replaced your arm”.

With a small smile you pulled him on your lap and held him close. “Thank you, once again” you murmured into his fur.

You stayed there for a long time. Suddenly your stomach growled and Kuro forced you to get up and join the others. Yin didn’t even look surprised at your late arrival. You were sat down at a table and got food and tea shoved in front of you. After a word of thanks you began chowing down the food. Even though your stomach cringed in reaction, you forced yourself to eat. You needed nutrients for what would come next.

“Lady Yin, Master Yang?” you questioned, your eyes filled with determination as the two cats looked up. You went from your seat and bowed before them. “Please teach me how to use, whatever it is that causes me to travel dimensions!”

Silence met you. Peeking up you saw the two sitting before you, their eyes revealing nothing besides the wisdom they held. “(y/n) what you have is a Kekkei Genkei” it was Dewid who spoke. You glanced over to him, eyes wide in shock.

“Like the sharingan and byakugan?”

He nodded, “your Dojutsu is the Jigengan, the eye of dimension” he explained.

“We can’t train you in that” Yang spoke, your head snapping back to the siblings.

“But we can train you in other things” Yin’s eyes lit up with something that could be either morbid interest or expectation. You sat up straight, your hands rest on your upper legs. “Master, Lady, would you please train me?” you rephrased. Small knowing smiles appeared.

“We will take you on as apprentice”, you smiled, “if you do everything as we demand”.

“I will” you exclaimed. “We will begin at sunrise, for now, go back to the room you came from and sleep” Yang said. You nodded and stood up.

“Are you sure about what you are doing?” Kuro looked at you form the rock. You glanced over at him, sleep already trying to take you away.

“Honestly?”

He nodded.

“No. I just know I want to get stronger. I don’t want to repeat history” your grimaced, reciting the names of the fallen comrads. Kuro sighed and laid down comfortably.

You didn’t mind the harsh wooden table. Exhaustion was far to great to make you bothered.

The way the great masters of the dimension had accepted you as a student was way too lenient. Now you knew why. Their way of training was spartan. Above the unusual hours you had little time to sleep or eat. Eating was done in a hasty manner, which wasn’t bad since the cook had no skill. Sleeping was in between sessions. To the masters it didn’t matter if it was day or night. They would train.

Training with Yang was first mainly based on stealth. You had certain basics from the academy, which were thrown out of the window by him since he didn’t deem them worthy. So starting all over again, he forced you to throw away your shoes and taught you new ways of walking. After that he taught you how to redirect the enemies attention. Something he had done the moment you met him, you didn’t see him even though he was a black spot against the white fur.

At the same time he taught about avoiding being seen. This was done with Dewid, Arcain, and Susha. Arcain was a feline that easily reached Kakashi’s height, scars battered his orange striped fur. Susha was your height, her fur was beige while the tips of every end, like ears and feet, were black.

Training with Yin consisted of learning about all kinds of herbs, not only the ones at home but also from other dimensions. This was quite hard since you weren’t the most studious. Comparing you to Ebisu would be comparing a 10 to a 5.

After learning which plant connected to which purpose you were thought how to prepare, preserve and mix them. This didn’t always end well. The worst was making a cocktion that should have been good against paralysis but ended up as poison.

When these skills were well enough imprinted into your mind you received more free time. This you used to discover the properties of your Kekkei Genkei. The first thing you were able to do without much use of chakra, was look into dimensions. Not physically or mentally being there, just looking.

The second thing that you achieved was using less chakra in dimension hopping. The ‘dimension peeks’ helped greatly with navigating. This way you avoided dimensions like the snake one, where you couldn’t breathe.

Through the whole training period the faces of the ones in the other dimension. Mainly a certain silver haired Jonin.

“How are ya?”

You looked up from the script on herbs you were reading and smiled at the sight of the familiar golden eyes. “Pretty well. Where have you been?” you questioned, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “Here and there” he mused and jumped on the table. “When do you plan on returning?” the cat questioned curiously. “How long has it been?”

“6 years”

“I meant in my dimension” you rolled your eyes at his smug smirk.

“Just 5 days”.

With a sigh you closed the book and turned to him. “I should go back. Do you think they will notice I am older?” you asked curiously. Kuro shook his head, “if you don’t look at your extra muscle nothing changed”. You chuckled, he was right and it was weird. To age without aging.

“When are you going?”

“I will wait until my chakra is fully restored” you concluded and put the book back in the case. “Why? Dimension hopping doesn’t use that much chakra anymore, does it?” he asked.

“I want to come there completely healthy, start a new…. Or rather an old” you looked down with a shy smile. “It seems Kakashi wasn’t my boyfriend before I supposedly died”.

“So? Is he now?”

You nodded, “he was really…. Something when he let his control loose” you chuckled.

“Too much information” Kuro grimaced but then scowled, “did he take advantage of you?”

“You could see it that way. Though I don’t” you smiled, “because I already like him the most of everyone I knew”.

Kuro shook his head disapprovingly, “when you change your mind say so and I will rip out his throat”.

“Will do” you chuckled and laid down on the bed.

“I can’t thank you both enough for everything you have done” you bowed deeply for the two small cats. “Oh dear, the pleasure was ours” she purred, some muscles in your body aching at the memory of her punishments for mistakes.

“I do hope we meet again” Yang glared at his sister for a small moment before giving you a gentle smile. “May fate intertwine our paths” you mused standing up straight. He chuckled, “safe trip”.

“Thank you” you said and with a flicker of your chakra a portal opened to your right side. With confidence you stepped through it, ending up in the hall in front of the hokage’s office. You knocked on the door. “Just a moment” the old man’s voice sounded. You smiled and sat on a chair next to the door. Minutes passed and the door opened, revealing a woman with long, curly, black hair and wine red eyes, which fell on you.

“(y/n)? I heard you were back but since I hadn’t seen you..” she trailed off a smile on her lips. “Good to see you too Kurenai” you mused standing up. Her eyes lit up, “I heard you lost your memory”.

You tapped your head with a grin. “Got it”.

She chuckled, “we should go out for tea sometime”.

You gave a nod, “we will, I need to report back to the Hokage but… see you around?”

“Definitely” she smiled and patted your shoulder before leaving you in the empty hallway.

Once again you knocked on the closed door of the Hokage office. “Come in” his voice was warm, a doting grandfather warm.

You entered the office and his eyes lit up at the sight of your form. “(y/n) I received your note. I didn’t know you would be back this soon” he said pleasantly surprised. You chuckled and sat down in one of the three chairs in front of his desk. “Me neither, though l must say, where I went minutes seem like hours” which was actually the case.

“Since you have returned like this, I take your memories have returned” he asked, folding his hands over each other. “You betcha Sarujii” you grinned.

A disappointed smile appeared on his face, “I had hoped you had forgotten about that nickname you gave me”. You grinned broadly, “can’t believe I called you that even when you were young” you mused, “I shall better my ways though”.

“Glad to hear” he chuckled. It took a mere moment for his joyful eyes to turn serious. “Four days ago, a day after you left, Kakashi came into my office asking about your whereabouts. Make sure you clear this up with him” he stated. You nodded, feeling a bit guilty for worrying him. “I acted irrational in annoyance. I will clear it up” you declared. His joyful expression returned and with a smile he nodded, “very well. Anything else?” you shook your head, “then until next time”.

“Until next time” you saluted before going out of the office.

At first you were leisurely strolling through the streets. This turned into normal walking, to quick pacing until you were running. A smile etched on your lips when the 2 story house came into sight.

Using the spare key you got inside. Spreading your senses you couldn’t see Kakashi anywhere near the house. Deciding to wait for him, rather than bother the training with his team you dropped down on the couch. Your eyes closed and the smile stayed on your lips as your eyes travelled through all kinds of amazing worlds.

The door cracked open and your attention flickered away from the black and white world you had been looking at. Your eyes opened and watched the wall. A smile etched on your lips by seeing Kakashi putting of his shoes.

With nimble, bare feet you moved soundless over the wooden floor. “Kakashi!” you smiled broadly. His one eye glanced up, something flickering across you couldn’t quite place. He stood up straight. The sight of him had more memories popping into your mind, a warm fuzzy feeling spreading through your body.

“I-” you frowned as he didn’t bat another eye at you. He simply walked past you into the kitchen. With the frown still there you followed after him. “Kakashi? Welcome home?” you questioned, wondering if you had turned invisible. His eye lazily turned to you, giving you the confirmation that he did actually see you.

“Hey Kakashi” you said, your voice dimmed to a gentle whisper, “I’m sorry I left without saying anything to you”. He did not even look at you now. “I know I was being childish by leaving with only giving the Hokage a note… but at that time I was really pissed that I had to do a D rank mission because of you. I could understand it if it was C or B but D? I am no child” you stated crossing your arms.

Once again he did not react to your words, instead he peered into the fridge and pulled out a can of soda.

“Kakashi. I am sorry… are you even listening to me?” your guilt was slowly replaced by irritation at the lack of reaction from the man. You’d rather have him yell, scold you for your actions. Even if it wasn’t in his character to do so. It would have been better than this. 

He turned on his heel to go to the living room, but the irritation had your hand moving to his shoulder and shoved him around, forcing him to look your way. His inky black eye held nothing. It was like he stared at empty space and your stomach dropped. “Kakashi, I apologised, I reflected. What more do you want me to do?”

His eye slightly narrowed. “I mean, how can I make it up. I mean… Hell I don’t know what I mean. Just stop giving me the cold shoulder! Scold me! Yell at me! Anything is better than you not acknowledging my existence!” your voice rose until you were yelling at his face. His empty stare turned into a silence glare, but he made no move to go to the living room.

“I honestly am sorry for the way I acted! Do you know how difficult it is to apologise! After everything… after-” you gritted your teeth and looked down. ‘ _After coming back from the dead. After realizing I was alone in the world with no one to depend on. After the guy who took you in tried to take your body. After trusting you even though I had no memories_ ’.

“Well?”

His voice echoed between your ears and your head snapped up glaring straight into his eye. “AFTER I WENT THROUGH HELL AND BACK” you snapped, tears brimming at your eyes but never falling. Your breath faltered. His eye slightly widened at your outburst. “Have you any idea how frightening it is to know nothing?! Even your own name has to be told by your summon animal!” you were screaming now, the sound foreign to your ears, “To be taken in by people you think could help but end up betraying you?! To know only one name that isn’t even yours?!”

His eyes seemed to soften as he reached out to calm you but you slapped his hand away. Your body trembling from the strain of holding back the violent sobs. The emotions that had been unconsciously building up were on the brim of pouring out. The emotions that would have brought danger to you, be it any other than Kakashi.

“(y/n) calm down” he whispered. His voice was a bit sterner than he had liked it to be. He was still mad at you.

You shook your head and took a step back. A tear rolled down and you cursed it as you rubbed your cheek. He tried to step forward, to reach you but you were out of the room within seconds. Dashing past him and through the front door.

You had no clue where to go, or why you were running. All you knew was that the excitement of seeing Kakashi had disappeared and loneliness sounded really good right now.

A drop of water exploded on your nose. Gradually you came to a stop and looked up at the sky. “Rain.. it’s been a while” you muttered with a small smile. At Mount Nekono it never rained. There were several enormous lakes but rain never fell. Taking a deep breath helped the typhoon of emotions to settle down to a mere gust in your mind.

You resumed your way in a slow pace. You didn’t exactly know where your feet would bring you but it felt right to just walk. Your bare feet feeling the cold, soaked ground. Your clothing clinging onto your body for dear life.

Your eyes widened slightly as your feet sunk a bit deeper into the ground. The ground in the woods was a lot looser than the ground in the unpaved streets. This felt a lot more natural. After a few minutes you reached a small open space, surrounded by large trees. You smiled at the tree stump in the middle of it.

This was one of your favourite training spots. It wasn’t as busy as the other training grounds and when the sky was clear you had perfect view of the stars. When the sun was at its highest point you could still find shadows under the trees and the tree trunk in the middle was so sturdy it had faced all of your attacks without budging.

With a sigh you dropped down on the wet trunk and glanced up at the cloud filled sky. “I miss the time here with Rin” the words gave more gravity than your thoughts could. Biting your lip you stared at the soggy grass. “You were too kind for your own good” you whispered, Rin’s face flashing before your eyes. “You wanted to save everyone, yet you didn’t save yourself” your voice broke, tears filled your eyes. “I am so sorry for forgetting our times together” you whispered.

It was as if the silence surrounded your body like a warm hug. The raindrops gave the comforting feeling of something patting your back.

“You are right” you whispered whipping away the tears mixed with raindrops. “I know you don’t want me to stand still!” you exclaimed, your voice faltering midway. “I don’t even understand why I’m thinking of you now. I could have thought about you at mount Nekono… I did, just not with this gravity” you sighed, “it’s as if by seeing him every memory comes crashing down, one by one”. You shook your head and stared at the drops on the grass. “I am one messed up undead” you sighed, “though I don’t even know if I actually did die. Black outs and such” you excused to no one in particular.

With a groan you let yourself fall back, laying on the width of the trunk. Your head snapped to the side. “He did follow me…” you muttered softly, the vision of Kakashi moving through the trees. “So he remembers this place as well” that brought a small smile to your lips. Only you, Rin, Kakashi and Mi-chan knew about this place. Or at least saw this place as a secret spot.

As his figure appeared from the growth you turned your eyes skyward again. “Took you long enough” you huffed and you could nearly hear the roll of his eyes. He strode over to you and bent over your face, blocking the view and the rain. “(y/n)-” he started but you interrupted by putting a finger on his masked mouth. “I am sorry for exploding on you, I was unreasonable and-” you gasped as he gripped your wrist tightly and pinned it against the tree trunk. “(y/n) listen!” he snapped, his eye fierce. You blinked in surprise and stared at his expression which was slowly calming down. He silently pulled you into a sitting position and took a seat next to you. “I hoped you remembered this place” he spoke, “you always came here when you were upset”.

You turned to him to see him facing the sky. “Whenever me or… Rin found you, you always smiled and shrugged it off. As if nothing happened” he had difficulty with bringing up Rin, the muscles of his jaw were tense. You silently waited for him to continue.

“Even now you are still the same as then. Never informing anyone about your plans, always acting rashly” he sighed, “but it looks like it’s too much for both of us”. Your stomach dropped. What does he mean, it’s too much for both?

“Kakashi I-” you were stopped again as he squeezed your hand. “So, next time, don’t bottle everything up. Don’t keep everything to yourself” he loosened his grip and gave a small smile, “or am I not worthy of your rants?” he gave an amused smile under his mask.

“I…” you looked down at your joined hands. With a deep breath you looked back up into his eyes. No hidden agendas, no lies, this man had always spoken the truth to you. Even with all your memories returned you found nothing that could even lead to a suspicion of betrayal. He helped you at your worst, so he deserved your best.

“I’m sorry for the events that has passed” you spoked softly, barely audible over the rain, “but I can’t share everything with you”.

His eyes widened and he obviously felt a mix of anger and sadness but you shut him up by talking again. “That’s simply impossible since I’m bad at judging what’s worth telling. So I’ll promise, that whenever I’m going somewhere, or when there is something I want to do, something I need to tell someone. I will tell you” you glanced up, watching the mixed feelings subside into satisfaction.

“I’ll take that” he chuckled and threw an arm over your shoulder.

A shudder ran over your spine as the wet clothes clung to your body even more at his touch. You looked up at him. “Am I forgiven for leaving you for… five days” you asked, remembering the time span the Hokage had said you were gone. “Only if you tell me what you have been doing over a cup of soup” he said as if he was actually considering not forgiving you. You shoved his shoulder playfully. “Deal” you chuckled and slid out of his grip, off the tree trunk. You turned on your heel and smiled at him. He gave you a helpless smile and slid off as well. “That will be a long cup of soup” you mused.

Kakashi chuckled and as he passed, his fingers entwined with yours. You looked down on your joined hands with a smile. “We have time” he spoke.

You hummed and walked besides him, enjoying the rain and the heat emanating from his body. It may sound odd to anyone else who saw you. But it wouldn’t be so bad if tomorrow never came and this moment would last forever.

“- and then she scolded me because I mixed the wrong ingredients” you sighed stirring in the soup. Kakashi had been listening to your story without saying a word, but you could see that he wanted to ask something.

“Ask” you stated. He blinked and turned to look at his soup with half interest. “You speak of so many things. Did this all really happened in those five days?” he questioned, “and where is Mount Nekono?”

You blinked, the realisation dawning on you had you burst out laughing. Kakashi looked even more confused now. “I forgot to tell!” you exclaimed. You had told him about the arrival at mount Nekono and that all your memories had returned. He had looked guilty at that, but you saved your questions for later as well. You told him about your training and how much the masters had taught you. What you forgot to mention was the most important thing.

“Mount Nekono is another dimension, like where your dog summons come from. I travelled to that dimension with my Kekkei Genkei” you chuckled, the laughter dying down.

“Since when do you have a Kekkei Genkai?” he asked astonished.

“It’s a Kekkei Genkei, I’m pretty sure it happens at birth” you retorted and put a big spoon of soup in your mouth. The herbs melting on your tongue had you nearly moaning. You had made the soup with the new knowledge of herbs and it paid off. Kakashi hadn’t touched it yet though.

“Now that I think about it” you mused, “I don’t know who my family is so it’s pretty logic that you don’t know. Neither did I for that matter” you put the spoon back into the bowl.

He gave solemn nod, “what does your Kekkei Genkai entail?” he asked curiously, the soup completely forgotten.

“It’s a Dojutsu, like your sharingan. However the abilities are quite different, or the same. You know I don’t know that much about the sharingan” you said thoughtfully, “Ah, but the abilities until now include a wide sensing range and traveling through dimensions by opening portals” you explained.

He frowned, ”that’s what happened when you suddenly disappeared right?” You nodded. “Then isn’t it a dangerous thing to use? You were hospitalized in a critical condition” concern laced his voice. This time it didn’t feel annoying, it felt comforting.

“Yeah. Master told me that the first jumps are the most dangerous. Right now I have practiced so much that I use just as much chakra as I use for a transformation jutsu” you smiled proudly. Kakashi looked sceptical, eyeing your attitude. But after a sigh a smile appeared, “as long as you don’t repeat the first time”.

“Promise” you smiled, “but I think I’ve told the most of it now” you mused, “so eat your soup before it is completely cold”. Kakashi nodded and the moment you looked at your empty bowl, he had finished his bowl of soup. You frowned. “Why so sneaky? It’s not like I haven’t seen your face before” you purred while licking your lips seductively.

He audibly swallowed, “just habit”. You chuckled and picked the bowls up to wash them.

“So all your memories are back?” he questioned, suddenly standing behind you. You hummed in response while scrubbing the pan with a sponge. “Everything?” he asked again.

“Yes, something you are worried about?” you mused looking over your shoulder at him.

His eye revealed the guilt he tried so hard to hide. “Something you did that you feel bad about?”

His head snapped up.

Bull’s eye.

“(y/n), you have to know that I didn’t want to take advantage of you. I didn’t even have that in mind. But, the moment I saw you in the Hokage office” he rubbed the back of his neck, “I couldn’t believe my eyes….”.

You put the pan down and turned completely to Kakashi. Your eyes white like fresh fallen snow glanced into his midnight black orb. “I thought I had a small second chance.. I didn’t plan to do such things-” You placed your hands on his hips and kissed his chin, making him stop talking. “Kakashi, I don’t think you took advantage of me. I wanted you then and I want you now. Memories or no” you chuckled. He looked down with an expression that told you he wasn’t convinced. He really felt bad about having sex with you even though you weren’t in a relationship before your accident.

“Okay, close your eyes” you smiled. He looked confused at you. “Just do it” you sighed. Reluctantly he closed his eyes. Your hand reached up and you pulled down his mask and his headband away. Your lips found his in a sweet, loving kiss. “You know it’s me right?” you mused pulling back.

“Of course” he stated matter-of-factly.

“Even if you can’t see me” you continued, “just like I didn’t see you then”.

He opened his eyes, obviously confused. “I technically saw you, but-” you took his hand in yours and put them on your heart. “I was blinded without my memories. Yet, I still wanted you” you whispered looking at his hand on your chest.

“You aren’t making much sense…” Kakashi spoke. Your head snapped up with a glare. “Get it through your thick skull that I am content with how things went” you snapped. His head tilted back from your sudden outburst.

He sighed and gave you a helpless smile. “What am I going to do with you?”

“Let’s rephrase that” you mused, your hand sneaking under his shirt and resting on his toned abs. “Shall I do you?”

He chuckled and wrapped his arms around your waist. “Will the little lady let me?”

“I’m sure if you don’t call her little anymore she will” you huffed looking up at him. He kissed your forehead, creating little sparks through your skin. “That could be arranged” he mused. You squealed as he swept you off your feet and carried you off to the bedroom, princess style. 

A yelp left your lips as you were thrown on the bed. You scrambled into a sitting position only to be pushed down by Kakashi who crawled on top of you. Your lips curled into a smirk as your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him in for a deep kiss.

He groaned against your lips as your leg pushed against his groin. Your hands pulled at the collar of his shirt. A dark chuckle rippled from his body as he sat up, getting out of your grip. A grin appeared on his lips as his hands went to the rim off his shirt and he pulled it off. Your eyes roamed over his delicious body, something you could never see enough off.

With a growl you shot up and kissed him while your hands removed your own shirt. His callused hands ran over you bare back, causing shivers to run through your body. His hot breath caressed your skin as he kissed down your neck. A satisfied purr rolled over your tongue. Your hands reached up the back of his head and tugged at his hair, leading him further down. A low hum had his lips vibrating against your skin. Slowly traveling lower.

Smoothly he undid your pants and quickly got rid of it. Not soon after followed your underwear. You leaned up to get rid of the final piece. Your bra.

A yelp echoed through the room as he went down on you while you were still fumbling with the lock of your bra. Falling back on the bed you gripped the sheets as he worked his magic. His hands reaching up to roughly fondle your bare breasts. The room was filled with soft moans and ragged breaths.

With a frustrated groan you pulled him up on his hair, gaining a groan in return. “E-enough…” you breathed and pulled him back towards you, kissing him hotly.

His hands travelled down your belly, causing another round of shivers go over your body. His hands rested between your legs and it didn’t take long for him to thrust inside. You groaned at the sudden entrance, looking up at him was hazy eyes.

His cheeks had a light flush, his breath turned heavier. You could see the desire raging behind those eyes. You leaned in and bit his neck, your hands desperately clinging onto his torso, as if scared he would disappear into thin air. He groaned and kissed your neck sweetly, assuring you he was there and properly preparing you.

The foreign, yet familiar, object filled you up to the brim. A groan left your lips, not knowing it was from pain or pleasure. His breath became ragged. He grunted with restraint, wanting to give you the chance to adjust. You clasped onto his back and pulled yourself up, shifting your hips against his in the process. He moaned and glared at you. With a sheepish, teary eyed grin you looked at him. “Come on” you purred into his ear, “I’m tougher than you think” you playfully bit the shell of his ear.

Taking that as an okay Kakashi began to thrust inside of you, over and over again. Soon your moans mixed with his deeper ones. Your breath mingled in deep hungry kisses.

You cuddled deeper into the soft, yet firm, surface you were laying on. A low chuckle rippled through the surface and it had you groan in frustration. “5 more minutes” you muttered. A warm hand caressed your bare back. Like a cat your body moved up at the spot where the hand touched. Another chuckle vibrated through the surface and had your eyes slowly opening.

“Good morning” a croaky voice spoke. You glanced up and frowned. “Did I fall asleep in the middle?” you questioned, not remembering when you had fallen asleep. “More like, passed out” he mused, his fingers twirling with a lock of your hair. You grunted and buried your face into his chest. “I was just tired” you muttered into his warm skin.

He chuckled, “whatever you wish” he mused.

You laid on his chest for a long time. Just content laying like that. Hearing his heartbeat and feeling his chest rise and fall.

“How much I’d love to stay like this….” he sighed and you looked up.

“Prior appointment?” you questioned, propping yourself up on your arms. “Yes, the Chunin exams are approaching”.

You rolled off his chest and looked at him. “And? Your students are still young”.

“I think they stand a chance” he spoke while sitting up. Your eyes travelled over his toned sides, down to his hips and his jewels. The sight had you bite your lip unconsciously. Kakashi glanced over and ruffled your hair. “That’s no attitude for someone who passed out” he teased.

You glared up at him, “next time I’ll make you pass out”.

“I’ll look forward to it” he mused and swept his legs of the side of the bed. He slowly began to go through the process of dressing himself. After a few minutes of watching him you stood up.

This you immediately regretted. As if your life depended on it you turned tail to the bathroom.


	6. On track

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everyone is holding out in these pandemie times. Here something that may entertain you for a few minutes ^_^

When you arrived downstairs you could hear the bacon sizzling. After taking a seat, a plate was put in front of you with bacon, eggs and toast. You looked up at Kakashi with an appreciative smile.  
“Not stealing my clothes today?” he mused, eyeing your outfit.  
“I don’t plan to stay home. I’m coming with you” you stated simply.  
“Want to steal my pupils again?” he mused, sitting down with his own plate of food.  
“Maybe… I’d like to have a chance to know the blonde kid” you smiled.  
Kakashi arched a brow. “Cause he’s Mi-chan’s son. I wonder what he’s like” you grinned. He smiled in return and within no time the food had disappeared beneath his mask and he began cleaning. “They are a lot alike” he spoke, “though he is definitely different”. You rolled your eyes at his vagueness.  
“Is he still treated… the same way as when I left?” you questioned hesitantly. The memories you hold told you he was treated badly by the whole village. Nothing major, but to a child with no parents. It could have broken him. “Yes”.  
You clenched your fists staring at the empty plate. You knew full well how it was to be shut out. To be treated like some bantling. You didn’t have the greatest childhood. Mi-chan created the first light in your life. He didn’t treat you like a demon your eyes made you seem to be. Then came Rin who defended you from bullies. Then Might Guy who was to idiotic to care about appearances and then Ebisu who was practically forced to accept you since you were on the same team. Speaking of Ebisu…. “On a second thought I still need to catch up with Ebisu… and Kurenai….. but I also want to train Sakura” you groaned and slumped into your seat. “Why does being gone for so long have to be so difficult!”  
Kakashi chuckled and kissed your forehead before he slipped his mask back on. “Take it easy (y/n) they won’t blame you”. You sighed and sat up.  
“You are right…. I think I’ll visit Rin’s grave first. I promised her last time to bring flowers” you smiled. Kakashi’s eye softened, “then let’s do that together when I am done”. You turned to him with a smile, “alright. Then… I will have some tea with Kurenai, then after that I’ll sweep by Ebisu. At last I’ll look if they have any decent missions for me to take” you summed.  
“Do you still plan on moving out?” he questioned. His expression revealed nothing but knowing what you know now, it was a sore subject.  
“Maybe. Or I’ll just rent a room in here” you grinned.  
“You are fine as a freeloader though” Kakashi mused and wrapped his arms around your shoulders from the back.  
“I don’t like being too dependent” you mused looking up at him. He rolled his eyes, knowing that full well.  
“And I want to earn some pocket money” you kissed his chin. With a sigh he released you. “Very well. I need to go now. I’ll see you tonight” he said, ruffling your hair. You chuckled.  
“Don’t be late Sensei”.  
He flinched at the title and glared over his shoulder. “Not that you aren’t already” you mused. He rolled his eyes dramatically before leaving the house.

When you were done with cleaning around the house, you went over to Kurenai. She wasn’t at home but with your sensing range it took little time to find her at one of the training fields with three young individuals. You appeared next to her with a smile. “I take you don’t have time for a cup of tea?” you mused looking at a brown haired boy in a grey, fluffy hoodie, sparring with another guy. He had small framed sunglasses, hiding his eyes and a cloak with a collar that reached just under his nose.  
“Can’t say I can” she said with a smile, watching the two spar. There was a girl watching next to her. She had no pupils but a beige tinted white as iris. Her hair was black with a subtle blue glow when the sun hit it. “Hello” you smiled. The girl jerked in surprise and looked with big eyes at you. A small smile formed on her lips. “H-hello” her voice was barely a whisper.  
You gave her an encouraging smile before turning back to the sparring match. “These are your pupils? God, I really missed a lot, everyone is suddenly a teacher” you chuckled. Kurenai joined in and nodded, “the boy with the jacket is Kiba Inuzuka, his dog is called Akamaru. The other boy is Shino Abarame and the girl at my side is Hinata Hyuga”.  
You turned to the girl with a smile and held out a hand. “(y/n) (y/s), a friend of your teacher” you introduced. The girl timidly took your hand. “H-hinata Hyuga” she said softly.  
“Then… I guess I’ll be on my way” you turned back to Kurenai. She looked apologetic at you, “maybe another time” you winked.  
“Another time it is” she grinned. You waved at her before walking off.  
“I should get students as well” you mused, but soon shook your head, “that’s too early”.

The same way you found Kurenai, you found Ebisu. He was in an open space, talking his ‘wise words’ to a little kid. You watched in amusement as the kid failed in whatever he had to do and received a long lecture of how to do it.  
Taking that as a que to safe the boy you jumped down and poked the man in his back. He yelped and jumped away. You laughed, “can’t believe you are still weak there”. He glowered at your antics. “(y/n) from what do I owe this pleasure?” he said sarcastically, regaining his posture. The kid looked up at you. “Wow! How did you do that!” he exclaimed impressed. You smirked and blew your finger as if it was a gun, “I am just that skilled”.  
“Don’t feed him lies” Ebisu retorted, pushing his glasses further up his nose.  
You glared at him, “I may have been gone for a year, but I’m still better than you” you grinned smugly. The man looked sceptically at you.  
“Neh…” the kid’s hand tugged at your shirt, “who are you?”  
“I’m that stuck in the mud’s old teammate” you grinned, “and who are you?” you questioned curiously. “I’m Konohamaru!” he grinned proudly, “I’m going to be Hokage!”  
“Oh, I’d like to see that” you chuckled and patted his head. He glowered at you, probably irritated at the belittling gesture.  
“He is the grandson of the third” Ebisu retorted, “I am in charge of training him” he boasted. You turned to look down on the boy, “Oh, so you are Saruji’s grandchild”. He looked up, recognition in his eyes but he didn’t speak up. You turned back to Ebisu, “then I bet Konohamaru will be great at the basics” you snorted and looked back to the boy. “If you got those down you can come to me and I’ll teach you some real neat ninjutsu” you gave a playful wink. Instantly at hearing his name the boy cheered up. “I am not only good at basics!” Ebisu exclaimed. You rolled your eyes and walked over to him. “Sure you aren’t, that would give Jonin a bad name” you mused stopping before him.  
“If anyone, you would be giving Jonin a bad name, with your antics” he sighed, “I have no idea how you passed”.  
You rolled your eyes and patted his shoulder, “by being me. I passed in one go” you grinned, “earlier than you” your grin grew.  
His facial muscle twitched in annoyance. “(y/n) you are interrupting important training” he growled. You put your hands up, “fine, I’ll go” you smirked and turned on your heel.  
Before leaving you poked a point at Konohamaru’s back, “that’s his weak spot” you whispered before going off. 

Next you strolled into the mission office. “Back again?” Iruka smiled, “it’s been a while”. You nodded and stopped before his desk.  
“Any mission you got for me, something I can start tomorrow?” you questioned. He nodded and shuffled through a stack of papers. “Kakashi and Guy were going on a mission tomorrow but there needs to be a third person” he explained. You took the file and scanned it over. “B-rank, I’ll take it” you smiled. Iruka nodded and gave another form. You signed it, per protocol. “I take Kakashi is the captain?” you asked handing the paper back. Iruka nodded. “Then I’ll hear the details from him” you said.  
Iruka nodded, “good luck” he smiled. With a lazy wave you left the office and looked at the sky. It was halfway the midday and you still had time to kill before going to Rin’s grave.  
And what better way to kill time than to visit another dimension to train.

“Care to explain how you end all beaten up from having tea with Kurenai?” the silver haired Jonin glowered down on you as you sat on the couch with a sheepish smile. “Kurenai and Ebisu were busy with their students. So I kinda went into the snake dimension and fought some pissed of snakes” your voice became quieter under Kakashi’s stare.  
With a deep sigh he shook his head, “why are you always doing these kind of things?” he groaned walking into the kitchen. You perked up and followed after him. “Cause I need to sharpen my skills to protect everyone” you smiled broadly. Kakashi paused and looked over his shoulder at you.  
“It is I who wants to protect you” he grunted and turned to gather ingredients for diner. The flowers for Rin stood proud in a vase on the dining table. You had bought them after you managed to return into this world.  
“Aw, you want to protect me” you poked his side teasingly. He rolled his eyes but didn’t comment on it. You sighed and wrapped your arms around his waist as he calmly continued to chop the vegetables. “I’m going to be strong enough so it won’t happen again” you sighed contently, inhaling his musky scent, “I won’t leave you alone anymore”.  
The muscles under your arms tensed for a small moment, a small smile adorning your lips as you nuzzled into his back. “Cause who else is going to eat the food you cooked” you mused. He rolled his eyes, not ceasing his activity of cooking diner. You didn’t let go with him so he moved as much as he could with you clinging onto him.  
When he shoved the last vegetables into the pan and put the lid on top he turned in your grip and wrapped his arms around you. “Holding someone who is cooking is dangerous you know” he mused, his hand sliding through your hair.  
You glanced up, “he said while he was already finished”. He gave you a close eyed smile and lifted a strand of hair to his masked lips, gently kissing it. “Because you wouldn’t let go even if I asked” amusement twinkled in his eye.  
Your lips curled into a smile while a light tint of red adorned your cheeks. “How thoughtful” you chuckled, your arms loosening from his hips and wrapping around his neck. You kissed his clothed lips tenderly before letting go and turning heel to the table. Kakashi followed after you and as you took a seat he stood behind you. You looked up at him with a grin. “My shoulders are sore from tying snakes into knots” you stated. He rolled his eyes, his hands moving over to your shoulders and kneading them. His hands were gentle. Moving as if you could break with too much pressure. You hummed and leaned on the table, enjoying his attempt to massage you.  
The sound of an alarm had the hands move away from your shoulder. You looked sheepishly to the side and watched Kakashi put the fire off. “I should get my own mug” you grinned. He hummed in response while serving two bowls. “We should also add your own bowl and plate” he added.  
You sat up straight and took a deep breath, smelling the soothing aroma of food. “We can go shopping after we are done with the mission?” you questioned.  
He nodded, “I heard you would be joining Guy and I”.  
You nodded and began devouring the rich filled soup. “What are the details?” you questioned between mouthfuls.  
“We will be getting rid of a gang of rogue Chunin shinobi” he spoke, “they have been sighted around the fire temple. We will travel there tomorrow”.  
“Hm, so I take we will use my sensory skill to find them?” you mused.  
“That is one of the easiest options” he smiled, “we could also just track them”.  
You rolled your eyes. “Of course, let’s make it more difficult”. He chuckled and returned to eating.  
How the hell does he do it. It’s like he waits for a moment you don’t look and then within a second finishes all of his food.  
When both of you were done eating and cleaned up you set out for the graveyard of Konoha. There you gently put the pink Carnation before the headstone. “Did she like this flower?” Kakashi asked curiously as he never seen these on a grave.  
“They mean that she will never be forgotten” you spoke softly and sat before the grave. Kakashi knelt next to you, glancing at you from the corner of his eye.  
“As promised, I am back with flowers… again” you grinned at the headstone, “I brought some extra baggage with me, thought you might like it” you mused. Kakashi gave you a playful nudge in the side but didn’t interfere. “I should have lot to tell you. But… you know me. I’m not good at remembering what to tell” you chuckled sheepishly, hugging your knees. “There is something important I wanted you to know though” you smiled and your hand reached out to Kakashi’s, holding it gently. “I feel slightly guilty, knowing you but even so, I’d rather tell you now than you get to know it after I join you” Kakashi glared at you, “which will take a long time” you added, ceasing the man’s glare. “I love this idiot” you smiled broadly, the words lightening your heart. “And I wanted you to be the be the first that knew” you said looking at the headstone.  
Kakashi held your hand gently and turned to the headstone as well. “I love this fool” he spoke, “and I will make her happy. Since I probably won’t hear the end of it otherwise” he mused. You glanced up at him with wide eyes, your heart warming at his words. “I think she would give you an earful of scolding” you giggled. He turned to you and tightened his grip on your hand.  
“Then better avoid that”.  
You nodded and turned back to the grave. “I’ll try to visit whenever I’m free. Also alone so we can have some private talk again” you mused. Kakashi rolled his eyes with a sigh and stood up. “It’s getting late” he spoke. You nodded and stood up as well. “I’ll see you again” you gave a slight bow to the grave before following after Kakashi. 

‘It’s like… 4 o’clock. Still 4 hours until we have to meet Guy’ you thought looking at the moon shining through the crack of the curtains. Your attention shifted to the silver haired male sleeping besides you, one arm lazily over you while his other supported his head.  
Kakashi had the habit of letting go of you as the night proceeds, but always remains in contact in some way. Now it was an arm, other times it’s a leg, sometimes just his back against yours. It was quite nice to not be smothered.  
With expert skill you snuck out of the bed without waking the sleeping Jonin. You gathered your clothes and dressed in the Livingroom before going out in the fresh morning air. The wind licked at your bare skin, causing shivers to run down your spine. A smile crept on your lips, your knees bending, bracing your body.  
A spurt of energy running through your muscles had you taking off into the forest. A cry of joy left you. Your eyes wide open to the world around you. Different layers appear before you. Your lips curled into a grin. “Let’s warm up!” you grinned. A familiar tug at your chakra had a portal open in front of you. You dashed right through it, closing behind you.  
The trees were lavender while the grass was blue. The sky was an ire grey. The atmosphere was nothing short of ominous, but you only felt joy in seeing new surroundings. A giant tree moved its roots. Slowly unplugging itself from the ground before you. A slit opened, revealing jagged teeth as long as yourself. With a flick of the hand and another tug at your chakra another portal opened. Dashing through it you appeared back in Konoha, only yards up in the air.  
A cry of joy and excitement left your lips as you flipped in the air.  
Coming closer and closer to the ground you performed hand signs. “Water style: Geyser!” you shouted. A burst of water shot up, straight for you, breaking your fall and with some control of your chakra you had it lower yourself on the ground.  
Once down you shook yourself like a dog, which seemed futile. Your drenched clothes wouldn’t suddenly turn dry from shaking a bit. With a shrug you walked over to a bakery, knowing one that will be open at 5 o’clock in the morning.  
“Good morning Yusha” you smiled. The bell above the door chimed, announcing your arrival. A tiny man looked up from kneading dough. A shy smile adorned his lips, his walnut eyes, with a ring of emerald green at the centre, fell on you. “Welcome (y/n), isn’t it a bit too early? Did you go swimming” he mused eyeing your wet clothes, skilfully moulding the dough into balls and put them on the plate for the oven.  
“Isn’t it always? And something like that” you chuckled and glanced over the fresh baked goods in the showcase. “I’d like… you know what? Surprise me. Put 12 little breads in a bag” you grinned. Your eyes ran over the chocolate croissants, to the cheese sticks, all kinds of sweet and salty treats in between.  
“12? Isn’t that a bit much for a mere after training snack?” Yusha grabbed a plier and swiftly got to work.  
“4 for me and Kakashi this morning and the rest is a lunch, or snack, for three” you explained, forcing yourself not to look at what he put in the bag.  
“Very well” he handed over the bag and held out his hand. You rummaged through your pockets until you found the pocket money Kakashi had granted you until you would receive your pay check. Yusha smiled and took the money, “have a good day”.  
“You too Yusha!” you smiled before leaving the small cosy bakery.  
By now the moon had left the sky and the sun peeked over the horizon, casting an orange glow over the village. Long, relaxed strides brought you back to Kakashi’s house. Peeking inside with your sensing you saw the man still laying in bed. You shrugged and let him sleep until it was necessary to wake him up. Going into the kitchen you put the fire on to heat the pre-made miso soup.  
“Good morning” his raspy voice made something flutter. You turned with a smile, “good morning. Slept well?”  
He nodded and shuffled over to the pan of soup, smelling the contents. As he sighed content you moved over and kissed his masked cheek. “I brought some fresh bread”.  
He arched a brow, “how long have you been up?”  
“2 or 3 hours” you said tapping your chin in thought.  
“You could wake me up” he muttered and put of the fire, serving you and himself a bowl of miso soup.  
“You looked peaceful, didn’t want to disturb you” you mused, taking your bowl of soup and moving to the table. Inspecting the contents of the bag of bread you picked out four pieces that would taste the best when fresh. You handed Kakashi one of the most delicious, since there was only one.  
The man arched a brow, looking at the two pieces. “I thought you prefer this one”.  
You shrugged and took the bowl of soup in your hands. “You should enjoy it as well”.  
Kakashi smiled and picked up one of the pieces. “Then don’t mind if I do” he mused. You nodded and closed your eyes, sipping on the hot soup.  
When you returned the empty bowl on the table you blinked surprised at half of the bread you like. Looking up at Kakashi he gave a sheepish smile, his food completely finished. A small smile appeared on your lips while you took the piece to your lips, nibbling on it. The chocolate goodness filled your senses and a moan of delight left your lips.  
“You should have bought more if you like it so much” Kakashi mused, watching you.  
“I asked for a surprise bag because I couldn’t choose” you answered absentmindedly.  
He chuckled and stole half of a piece of your bread. Not minding it one bit you continued eating. Kakashi waited patiently for you to finish before cleaning up the utensils. You stood up and helped him.  
“How far is the fire temple?” you questioned while drying the dishes.  
“2 days of traveling” Kakashi answered, handing you another wet dish. You nodded and silently cleaned.

“Over here!” the man dressed in a green jumpsuit stuck out like a sore thumb. Izuma and Kotetsu looked at the enthusiastic Jonin as he waved to his two approaching teammates.  
You leaned towards Kakashi, “are we actually on time?” your eyes showed your disbelief at the sudden punctuality of the silver haired Jonin. He nodded in confirmation but didn’t explain why. You turned Guy with a smile and waved back, less enthusiastic. “Great you can join us on this mission of youth!” Guy exclaimed with a sparkling smile.  
“Great to be back” you mused, “ready to go?”  
Guy and Kakashi both nodded and bend their knees. You followed their example and off you three went. Dashing through the woods.  
Even though your stamina had returned completely, running for 3 hours straight took a toll on your body. Your breath became more elaborate as you tried to keep it under control. Something you didn’t want to do was propose a break. That meant giving in that they both had better stamina, which they probably did, but they didn’t need to know that.  
“Guy”.  
He turned his head to look at his silver haired comrade. “Let’s take a rest by the upcoming stream” Kakashi stated.  
Guy frowned in response, “we can still at least get halfway!” he exclaimed encouraging.  
Your stomach dropped at his mindset. Of course he wanted to shorten the travel time. Of course he wanted to over exert himself. You looked at Kakashi, hoping he won’t give in to Guy’s stupidity.  
His coal eye shifted to you for a small moment before returning to Guy. “We have two days to travel. It’s better if we arrive in top condition, instead of tired out from the journey” he reasoned. Guy thought for a moment but then put his thumbs up. “Great thinking!”  
You sighed in relief, keeping your eyes on the road.  
Relieve filled you as the creek came into sight. It didn’t take long for your team to arrive at it. You crouched besides the water and smiled at the clear water, breathing deep through your nose to stabilize your breath. Guy on the other hand was stretching his limbs, preparing to run again any minute.  
A gentle hand on your shoulder had you looking up. “How are you holding up?” Kakashi’s voice didn’t show but you could see the concern layered behind that stoic expression.  
“I’m fine, just need a bit of time” you assured and turned to look at the clear creek. “What time is it?”  
Kakashi paused to look up at the sky, “I’d say it’s around 11 o’clock”.  
You nodded and stood up. With a swift movement you ended up behind Kakashi and rummaged through the backpack. The silver haired male waited patiently until you pulled out the bag of bread and a bottle of water. “I brought some supper” you mused, opening the bag. The smalls weren’t warm, but smelled delicious nevertheless.  
Guy peeked over your shoulder and smiled broadly. “What thoughtful of you to bring something to replenish our energy!” he exclaimed. You nodded, ignoring his antics and handed both males two pieces of bread. You looked around to find somewhere to sit.  
The creek was surrounded by trees. The creek itself was filled with rocks from all sizes, which also covered part of the edges. The trees were your average size, not like the ones at Mount Nekono. A smile tugged at your lips as you spotted a fallen tree trunk. It had mushrooms and moss growing on it, but that didn’t bother you much. With a light skip in your step you walked over to it and took a seat, munching happily on the rosemary bread.  
Kakashi strode over to you and stood in front of you. You glanced up, wondering why he moved over, but he didn’t show any reason for doing so.  
After a quiet snack, which is quite an achievement with Guy in the company, your team took off once again. Not stopping until you reached the checkpoint for the day. 

Arriving at the small grass field, surrounded by trees, it was still light. The sun was slowly closing in the horizon, warning you that setting up camp had to be done quickly.  
“Guy, gather enough firewood for the night. (y/n) gather diner and preferably also breakfast” Kakashi ordered calmly. You grinned and gave a mocking salute before disappearing through the trees.  
First you gathered a big arsenal of herbs found in the perimeter. Next you looked for fruits and vegetables, which was less rewarding. You ended up with 4 carrots. At last you set your sense on full range, looking for any wild life.  
When you arrived at the camp you had a hare with a kunai wound in its neck, carrots and a small bag full of herbs. Kakashi had made a place to start a fire and put stumps around it, serving as chairs.  
He looked up and smiled, “if you prepare the soup, I’ll skin the hare” he spoke. You nodded and put the hare by his feet before pulling a small lightweight pan out of his bag.  
When you came back from filling the pan with water, Guy had arrived with a pile of wood, as big as he is tall. You frowned, “did you challenge to gather as much as you could carry?”.  
“Yes! It’s quite a feat if I say so myself” Guy grinned proudly. You rolled your eyes, walking over to him and eyeing the pile of wood. “Well, at least we won’t get cold” you mused and looked up at Guy. “Not bad Fuzzybrow” you smiled.  
“(y/n)! You remember the nickname you gave me!” he exclaimed happily grasping both your hands. You blinked in surprise. “Eh, yeah, I have all of my memories back” you laughed sheepishly.  
Guy laughed as he pulled you into a crushing hug. “That’s fantastic! Now you remember our youth!”  
You rolled your eyes at him. “Yeah, yeah” you chuckled before wriggling out of his hold. “Try to keep my bones whole okay?”  
“Ah” Guy looked a bit uneasy, “sorry”. He looked uneasy? Guy never looked uneasy. It also could have been your imagination. I mean, come one, that idiotic dork doesn’t understand the meaning of nerves.  
“(y/n) did you start with the soup?” Kakashi’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts and had you turn around. “I’ll start” you announced, going back to the pod with water in it. Some herbs were mauled and put in the pot while others were kept whole to avoid making the flavour too overpowering. Next you began chopping the carrots, which was pretty difficult with a kunai.  
“Hn, Asuma’s knuckle knives are much better for this” you muttered, cutting the third carrot.  
“Don’t let him hear it. He’d rather cut with a kunai than his trademark weapon” Kakashi stated.  
“Ah, his precious” you mused and began on the last carrot. “Can you start the fire?” you questioned without looking up. Kakashi gave a nod, even though you didn’t see it you could hear the rustling of his hands.  
A warm wind blew into your face, making you smile. “Thanks” you said and put the filled pod on the fire, placing the lid on top to let it cook for a while.  
You stared absentmindedly at the pod. The fire licked at the bottom, dancing along the side as if it was trying to swallow it. “Should I put the meat in?” Kakashi questioned, not wanting to ruin your idea of diner. You nodded.  
Your mind wandered over memories. They started out nice. Many times you went to train with Rin, the first time you succeeded in a jutsu, the sparring sessions with Guy, having heated discussion with Kakashi. But slowly you wandered to the darker part of your mind. Clear visions of the memories appearing before your eyes. The masked man in front of your door, his voice deep and monotone. A scream of your own, ringing in your ears.  
The bloodied faces of your comrades. Each one of them being precious to someone. Only you, who only had Kakashi left, survived. Only you were allowed a miracle of rebirth. Wasn’t that unfair? Shouldn’t you be the one to have died there, instead of your team?  
“(y/n)”  
Your head snapped up, a sheepish smile forming on your lips. “Ah sorry, what did you say?” you excused rubbing the back of your head. The two males frowned at you. “Tomorrow we will be arriving at the temple. I’m sure you know it as well, but a temple has rules and standards which we should respect” Kakashi spoke slowly.  
You nodded, “obviously”. Your attention shifted to the soup, the hunger you had felt halfway the midday had been replaced with an uncomfortable knot. You lifted the lid of the pod and stared at the boiling meat. “10 minutes” you stated and put the lid back on.  
“Where is that book?”  
You looked confused at Guy who was focused on Kakashi. He however, looked just as confused as you did. “Wh-”  
“Ah! You want to have a duel! Of course!” Guy exclaimed jumping to his feet. Kakashi looked confounded at the enthusiastic man.  
“No?”  
Guy frowned and put a hand on his chin in thought. “Then why…. Are you perhaps ashamed to show your youthful book to (y/n)?” he thought out loud.  
Kakashi flinched, your eyes focusing on him.  
“What book?” you spoke.  
“It’s nothing really” Kakashi waved you off.  
Guy sat back down with a smirk. “It’s in his weapon pouch” he grinned proudly. He finally saw his chance to take a little harmless revenge on the man who punched him for no apparent reason. Guy deemed it no reason, though Kakashi did have one. Feeding your girlfriend drunk and telling lies wasn’t really a part of everyday life.  
Kakashi slowly rose from his seat with an unnerved expression. “It’s just a book I read from time to time” he excused.  
“Then why so uneasy about the matter?” you mused, slowly standing up as well.  
A tense silence rose between the two of you.  
Suddenly your bent knees fired you towards the tense silver haired male. He quickly dodged to the side, to avoid your hands.  
You landed on one leg and twisted with your bodyweight, firing yourself towards him again with your other leg. He dashed to the side, avoiding you once again.  
A quick set of hand signs had an earth-clone buried in the ground and one earth-clone standing at your side. You both dashed for the silver haired Jonin.  
He managed to fight you both off but still went the way you chased him to. Suddenly hands sprung from the ground and grabbed Kakashi by the ankles. A victorious smirk appeared on your lips. While his focus was shifted to the clone in the ground, you snatched a book out of his weapon pouch and jumped back.  
His eyes widened as he dashed for you. The clone turned back into earth, signalling he was too late. “Icha Icha paradise? Kakashi…. I honestly expected more of you” you sighed and threw the book at him. Kakashi caught it and did a quick run over for damages before putting it into his weapon pouch. “It’s a good story” he excused and turned back to sit by the fire. You followed after him and sat down on a stump. “That’s the ero books written by Erofrog. Good story my ass” you snorted and put the lid off the pod, steering into it with a big spoon.  
“(y/n) That smells of youth!”  
You looked up with a confounded expression, “thanks?” You picked the three lightweight bowls out of the backpack and filled each to the brim with soup and added a spoon before handing one to each male.  
“Thanks for the food” Kakashi muttered before eating. Guy said something similar and dug in as well. You nodded and took a spoonful. The flavours exploded in your mouth and a soft moan left your lips. “Spartan training with Yin was so worth it” you chimed.  
Kakashi glanced up, “this food was worth all that suffering?” he mused, remembering your complaints about Yin’s punishments. You rolled your eyes and pointed the empty spoon at Kakashi.  
“Good food can save the day”.  
You served seconds for yourself and Guy since Kakashi actually took his time to eat. By the third portion Kakashi finally had his second serving.  
“(y/n) are you okay with taking the first round?” Kakashi spoke as you cleansed the utensils with some water.  
“Sure” you answered and got up, “shift divided by three?”  
He nodded, “I’ll take it over from you, Guy is last” Kakashi looked over at the man who put his thumbs up. You chuckled softly and dried the utensils off. “Then I wish you two a good night sleep” you mused, taking seat on a stump. Kakashi ruffled your hair with an adoring look on his face before he retired to a spot close enough to the fire for warmth but not close enough to get burned by turning.  
“Good night!” Guy smiled and dropped down opposite Kakashi, by the fire. 

You stared off in the distance, enjoying the cold night air caressing your bare skin. A shift in Kakashi’s body had you looking to the side. A frown creasing your eyebrows at the sight of his tense muscles. With expert silence you moved over to his side. He laid on his right side, facing the fire. His back facing you.  
It had been about two hours now. It would be another 1,5 hour for the shift change. You glanced down sympathetically. Your hand slowly reached out and rested on his shoulder.  
You held back a yelp as his hand suddenly went up and grasped yours. Observing his breathing you concluded he was still asleep. His fingertips were cold against your warm skin. A small smile tugged at your lips as his muscles began to relax, a relieved breath leaving his lips.  
‘How cute’ you mused looking down on him.  
1,5 hour further into the night there had been no changes in the surroundings, only wildlife that avoided the camping place. No humans were detectable.  
Gently you shook Kakashi with the hand he had held for the whole time. “Kakashi, it’s time” you whispered close to his ear. His eyes groggily opened and glanced up at you. His hand slowly released yours as he sat up, rubbing the back of his head. “Any changes?” he questioned lazily.  
“Not in 5 km surrounding us” you hummed and laid down on the spot he had been laying. He turned to you, a smile under his mask. “Thanks”.  
“You’re welcome” you mused and propped your arm under your head as a pillow. The warmth of the fire licked at your skin, your eyes slowly closing while the exhaustion of the day took over.

With a gasp your eyes shot open and darted from side to side. Sweat trickled down your temples. The haziness before your eyes slowly twisted and turned until it formed a cloudy sky. You took deep breaths to calm your raging heart.  
A nightmare had terrorised your sleep. It was like going over the memory of the slaughter over and over again. Taking time to relax your muscles you shifted your attention over to Guy a few meters away. “Why has that idiot so much energy” you whispered, cringing at the thought of doing handstand push-ups this early.  
Gradually you got yourself more comfortable on the grass and stretched your sore muscles. Satisfying pops filled your body with relieve.  
“(y/n)! good morning!” your head snapped over to the loud man who now stood on two feet. You held a finger before your mouth with a glare going between him and the resting form of Kakashi. Guy blinked in surprise before a smile spread over his lips. He strode over to you and took a seat on the grass besides you eyeing the sizzling embers.  
“We could draw a monocle like old times”.  
You turned to the grinning man. “I don’t think the people in the fire temple will take our captain serious if he has a drawn monocle” you snickered while playfully pushing the raven.  
“Nonsense, one glare and they will!” Guy smirked.  
You rolled your eyes, “it didn’t work with Ebisu, who had a moustache drawn on his face. The client laughed at him while he tried to uphold the don’t kill the client rule” you mused, picking up a stick and poking against the blackened wood.  
Guy let out a hushed laugh. “I think my rival wouldn’t stoop to that level of irritation”.  
You arched a brow with an amused smile, “He wouldn’t place his irritation on the client indeed. He would smack you into the ground though”.  
Guy shook his head, fist held in the air, “I would gladly accept that duel!” he exclaimed.  
You shook your head with a helpless chuckle, while patting his back, “weirdo”.  
Guy grinned down on you, “shall we?”  
“I’d rather not face his fury” you mused.  
Guy shrugged as he crept over to the silver haired Jonin. A smile spread across your lips as you noticed the change in Kakashi’s breathing pattern. He had been awake this whole time.  
Guy stopped midway and frowned, probably noticing the same.  
You chuckled and rummaged through the bag of herbs, getting out a variety to serve as breakfast. You wove them quickly into a bar and threw one at Guy, who caught it easily. “This will serve as breakfast” you stated and threw another at Kakashi. His hand snapped up, catching it in mid-air. He slowly sat up and looked dubiously at the food.  
“It has enough nutrients, if you are worried about that” you stated and nibbled on your own. It didn’t taste the best, but it was easy and fast.  
Guy grinned, “since when have you become this resourceful?”  
“Since I trained with my masters” you stated, watching in amusement when the first bite had his face contorting.  
Turning to Kakashi you noticed the bar already gone. “When will we arrive?” you asked, taking the last bite of the bar.  
“Around 1” Kakashi said and put his backpack back on his back.  
“You’ve never been to the fire temple?” Guy questioned, working the last bite of the bar away.  
You shook your head. A smile spread across Guy’s lips. “As soon as you see it you will be filled with the spirit of youth!” he exclaimed.  
You arched a brow in confusion.  
“It’s something with a great atmosphere” Guy elaborated. Your mouth formed an ‘O’ and spread into a smile. You jumped up and patted the grass off your clothes. “Let’s see if it can go against the latest sights I’ve seen” you mused.  
Guy smirked, “could be a serious rival!”


End file.
